Ugueth Urbina pitched yesterday

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Former Expos, Red Sox [and a bunch of other teams’] reliever Ugueth Urbina has been indisposed for several years. Which is what happens when you attack several men with a machete and then try to douse them with gasoline.  He was sentenced to 14 years in a Venezulean prison, serving a bit under six, before being released in December of last year.

Last night he returned to the mound for the Caracas Lions, pitching a scoreless sixth inning, striking out one and walking one. Here’s the box score. Here’s the game story. The gamer is in Spanish, which is awesome in Google translate if, for no other reason, than “seasons” gets translates to “harvests.” Also: I learned that “slugfest” is “el festival de batazos” in Spanish, and that’s just an utterly fantastic phrase.

The story says Urbina had not pitched in Venezuela since the winter of 2000-01, which roughly corresponds with the point in his career where you’d expect a major leaguer of his stature to no longer play winter ball. Either way, this appears to be Urbina’s first actual baseball game since he finished the 2005 season with the Phillies.

He’ll turn 40 in February. No idea what his plans are, but it’d take the most improbable comeback in baseball history if he wanted to pitch in the bigs again.

Nationals place Stephen Strasburg on the disabled list

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Nationals starter Stephen Strasburg lasted only two innings in Sunday’s start against the Diamondbacks. He said he had trouble getting loose and had some stiffness in his forearm. Two days ago Dusty Baker said that expected Strasburg to make his next scheduled start on Saturday at home against the Rockies.

Nope. Not happening.Today the Nationals placed Strasburg on the 10-day disabled list with a right elbow nerve impingement.

Not that they expect it to be a long stay. The plan is for him to miss one start, rest up and come back. Erick Fedde will be promoted from Triple-A Syracuse to pitch in Strasburg’s place on Saturday against the Rockies.

Optimistically, this is a situation in which, if the Nats were in a tight race, Strasburg would try to gut it out, but since they’re not, they can afford to be cautious with him. Obviously time will tell if such optimism is warranted.

Danny Tartabull: dumbest fugitive alive

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Remember Danny Tartabull? He was a pretty dang good, and underrated, slugger in the 1980s and 1990s. For a brief moment he was even baseball’s highest-paid player. He began with the Mariners, but his best years came in Kansas City where he put up a line of .290/.376/.518 (144 OPS+) with 124 homers over five seasons. From there he went to the Yankees, where he continued to be a solid producer for the most part, with an .845 OPS (128 OPS+) and added another 81 homers in four seasons. He was a journeyman after that and retired after the 1997 season.

Since then things haven’t been all that great for Tartabull. While he was a key contributor to the teams for which he played, he didn’t contribute much to his own dang children. In 2011 he was adjudged a deadbeat dad with a $275,000 outstanding child support bill for which he received a criminal conviction. He was granted probation, which he violated, and then failed to report for the six-month jail sentence he was handed. Since 2012 there has been a warrant out for his arrest.

Given that there are still enough people around who know and remember Danny Tartabull, it seems like it’d be pretty easy to track him down. He’s been a fugitive for the past five years, however, likely due to the police not prioritizing a six-month sentence for a deadbeat.

Thankfully, though, Tartabull helped them out. How? He called them:

54-year-old Tartabull has basically been under the radar ever since … until July 24, when he called police himself to report that his car had been broken into near his apartment in Agoura, CA.

When cops arrived, they ran Tartabull’s name through the system and noticed the active warrant — and immediately arrested him.

Not supporting your kids is shameful. Skipping out on a jail sentence is wrong. Calling the cops when there’s a longstanding warrant for your arrest is stupid.

Congratulations, Danny. You haven’t played baseball for 20 years, but this week you won the triple crown.