Keith Hernandez Jerry Seinfeld

Jerry Seinfeld to call the Mets game tonight

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What’s the deal with sacrifice bunts? I mean, who are these people calling for them all of the time? The only thing you sacrifice is your chance to score some runs.

[funky bass breakdown — cut to exterior of Monk’s Diner]

At least that’s how I’m going to imagine it’ll go tonight when Jerry Seinfeld — a huge, huge Mets fan — joins some combination of Gary Cohen, Keith Hernandez and Ron Darling in the SNY booth to call the Mets-Giants game.

Zack Wheeler is going for the Mets. He used to be a Giants prospect but they traded him away for a Carlos Beltran rental a couple of years ago. I know insult humor is not Seinfeld’s forte, but I’d like to think he has some zingers about that at the ready.

This isn’t Seinfeld’s first time at this rodeo. He called a game with Hernandez in 2010 too:

He had a suit on then. This time I’d like to think he’ll wear a big, oversized blue button-down shirt tucked into a pair of tight acid-washed jeans and a gleaming pair of white sneakers, because the 90s were the best decade ever and I miss them ever so much.

Seinfeld will appear on the pregame show at 6 p.m. ET. First pitch is scheduled for 7:10.

Mariners will retire Edgar Martinez’s No. 11

ARLINGTON, TX - APRIL 6:  Edgar Martinez #11 of the Seattle Mariners gets ready to bat during the game against the Texas Rangers at the Ballpark in Arlington on April 6, 2003 in Arlington, Texas.  The Mariners defeated the Rangers 11-2.  (Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images)
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Bob Dutton of the Tacoma News Tribune reports that the Mariners will retire Edgar Martinez’s No. 11 in a ceremony to be held on August 12. He’ll join Ken Griffey, Jr. as the only Mariners players to have their numbers retired by the club.

Martinez recently fell short of induction into the Hall of Fame, receiving 259 votes (58.6 percent) in his eighth year on the ballot. Many are confident he’ll get the necessary push to get enshrined before it’s too late.

Now 54 years old, Martinez spent 18 seasons with the Mariners. He retired with a .312/.418/.515 triple-clash line, 309 home runs, and 1,261 RBI. Martinez was a seven-time All-Star and five-time recipient of the Silver Slugger Award.

Mets tell Jay Bruce they plan on having him start in right field

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 22:  Jay Bruce #19 of the New York Mets reacts after striking out in the ninth inning against the Philadelphia Phillies at Citi Field on September 22, 2016 in the Flushing neighborhood of the Queens borough of New York City.  (Photo by Mike Stobe/Getty Images)
Mike Stobe/Getty Images
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The Mets told Jay Bruce that the club plans on having him open the season as the everyday right fielder, Ken Davidoff of the New York Post reports. This comes as no surprise after the Mets failed to get any bites after dangling Bruce as a trade chip. The Mets reportedly wanted a pair of prospects in exchange for Bruce.

With Bruce in right, Yoenis Cespedes back in left, and Curtis Granderson in center, Michael Conforto appears to be the odd man out. He’ll either warm the bench or head back to Triple-A Las Vegas for regular at-bats.

Bruce, who turns 30 years old in April, had a rough final two months of the 2016 season after joining the Mets in a trade from the Reds. He hit a paltry .219/.294/.391 with eight home runs and 19 RBI in 187 plate appearances. Bruce, apparently, wanted to go anywhere but in New York.