dan shaughnessy

Dan Shaughnessy essentially accuses David Ortiz of taking PEDs

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David Ortiz is off to an great start. So of course he must be cheating. At least that’s Dan Shaugnessy’s thought process:

I went to Ortiz Tuesday afternoon in the Sox clubhouse and put some hard questions to him. I told him he looks dirty.

Did he hear the fans in Toronto chanting, “Steroids!’’?

“No, not really,” said Ortiz. “Why?’’

Because what you are doing looks too good to be true.

“They test me all the time,” he said. “They make you pee and they test your blood, too. This year I would say I’ve probably been tested five times, peeing. Blood, just once. That was in spring training. They don’t warn you. They just show up.’’

What it is like to be suspected?

“I don’t think I have been,” he said. “Nobody comes to me and tells me, ‘They suspect you are using steroids.’ ’’

Shaugnessy’s evidence: Ortiz is Dominican. he was injured last year. He’s hitting well now. Ten years ago he tested positive for PEDs. Oh, and this gem when Ortiz asked if he’s not supposed to hit better when he is healthy than when he was injured:

No, but the rest of us don’t get better when we get older. I could touch the rim when I played basketball in high school. I’m not out there throwing down dunks today.

Well, what else do you need to hear? I mean, c’mon, no one in the history of baseball has ever hit .381 through 16 games. He’s basically breaking the laws of physics and bending the space-time continuum.

Of course Ortiz is tested just like every other player in Major League Baseball. Since the positive test in 2003 he has not tested positive. If Shaugnessy thinks that, despite this, Ortiz is dirty, he should have something better than “great hitter is off to a hot start.” Or he should explain why he has no faith in the drug testing system. But he has neither. He just took the laziest and most incendiary tack he could think of and ran with it.

Not that we should be surprised. This makes at least the tenth time — maybe the 100th time, I’ve lost count — since a blogger named Jerod Morris was pilloried by the print media for even suggesting that Raul Ibanez’s hot start in 2009 was, potentially, a result of PED use that a member of the print media has done the same damn thing. No one cares when it’s a credentialed member of the media, though. They’re allowed to hurl as many irresponsible allegations as they’d like because, hell, I dunno. Because they could touch the rim when they played basketball or something.

Angels sign Kole Calhoun to three-year, $26 million extension

ANAHEIM, CA - SEPTEMBER 26:  Kole Calhoun #56 of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim runs to first base during a game against the Oakland Athletics at Angel Stadium of Anaheim on September 26, 2016 in Anaheim, California.  (Photo by Sean M. Haffey/Getty Images)
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Angels outfielder Kole Calhoun had three more years of arbitration eligibility left, but he and the Angels decided to settle that future business at once on Wednesday, agreeing to a three-year extension worth $26 million, per SB Nation’s Chris Cotillo. The contract also includes a $14 million club option for the 2020 season.

Calhoun, 29, has been a dependable right fielder for the Angels over the last three seasons, batting an aggregate .266/.327/.436 with 61 home runs and 216 RBI in 1,895 plate appearances. According to FanGraphs, Calhoun has been the ninth-most valuable right fielder in baseball since the start of the 2014 season with 11.4 Wins Above Replacement. He ranks slightly behind Giancarlo Stanton (11.9) and just ahead of J.D. Martinez (10.9).

The Angels only have a handful of players signed beyond the 2017 season — just Albert Pujols, Mike Trout, Andrelton Simmons, and Calhoun. The club has options on Ricky Nolasco and Huston Street, while many others will be eligible for arbitration.

Bryce Harper lobbies for Matt Wieters and Greg Holland

WASHINGTON, DC - OCTOBER 13: Bryce Harper #34 of the Washington Nationals reacts after hitting a single in the seventh inning against the Los Angeles Dodgers during game five of the National League Division Series at Nationals Park on October 13, 2016 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Patrick Smith/Getty Images)
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Nothing is happening as the baseball world waits four more hours for the Hall of Fame announcement. Question: why do it at 6pm? For MLB Network ratings? Let’s be real, there are “Golden Girls” reruns on third-tier basic cable that are gonna draw a bigger audience. Why not announce it now so people can get on with their lives? Oh well.

As we wait, let’s take a look in at Twitter, where Jim Bowden of ESPN passes along the rumor that the Washington Nationals are still interested in signing Matt Wieters and Greg Holland:

Great to know that the Nats’ baseball operations budget is dictated by its capital expenditures. Maybe they shoulda been smart like the Braves and suckered — er, I mean negotiated the local government to pay more for it? GO BRAVES!

Anyway, Bryce Harper had a response to that:

I take that to mean that he’d take the money used to construct the team store and give to Wieters and Holland. I haven’t seen the budget breakdown for the new spring training facility, but that would probably mean a major pay cut for Wieters and Holland. And where would we buy our “Make Baseball Great Again” caps? Think ahead, Bryce. Play the long game here.