Italian sausage costume used for Miller Park races went bar-hopping and is now AWOL


As part of the festivities at Miller Park during Brewers games there’s a “sausage race” where people in Italian sausage, bratwurst, Polish Sausage, hot dog, and chorizo costumes have a mascot race.

But now the Italian sausage costume is missing, reports Lydia Mulvany of the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel:

The Klement’s Racing Italian Sausage went barhopping in Cedarburg recently, delighting patrons and posing for photos. The only problem: No one can say who was wearing the $3,000 costume, which had just been stolen from the city’s Winter Festival.

The 7-foot-long weenie was lying unused in a backroom at the Milwaukee Curling Club’s new Cedarburg location during a fundraiser on Feb. 16 with beer-tasting and curling, and a witness saw the sausage walk out of the south door about 7:45 p.m., Cedarburg police Detective Jeff Vahsholtz said Wednesday. The Italian walked into TJ Ryan’s in Cedarburg an hour later and also made an appearance around midnight at The Roadhouse Bar and Grill.

I’m sort of shocked to learn that those costumes cost $3,000, but not at all shocked to learn that someone who would steal a $3,000 sausage costume would immediately take it to a bar to hang out.

And here’s my favorite part from the news article: “Mustard Girl All American Mustards has offered a year’s supply of mustard to anyone who returns the Italian Sausage costume.”

What if this was all just a long con meant to secure a whole bunch of mustard?

Major League Baseball finds insufficient evidence to discipline Miguel Sano for sexual assualt

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In late December Betsy Bissen, a photographer for the Minnesota Twins website, Twins Daily, alleged that Miguel Sano assaulted her a few years ago. Bissen offered a detailed account of the incident.

In the account she said that in 2015 Sano was at an autograph signing at a store at which she volunteered. After the signing, she alleged that Sano grabbed her wrist and forced her to accompany him to a nearby store, attempted to force her through a doorway near the restrooms, tried to kiss her multiple times and continued to hold her, forcibly and painfully, by her wrist, in an effort to get her into the bathroom with him. She said the struggle lasted for 10 minutes, and her screams for help went unanswered.

Major League Baseball announced that it was investigating the matter. A few moments ago, it announced its findings and that it was declining to discipline Sano:

The Office of the Commissioner of Baseball has completed its investigation into an assault allegation made against Minnesota Twins third baseman Miguel Sano. The comprehensive investigation included interviews of more than 20 individuals, including Sano and the complainant, as well as a review of available documents, including communication records.

At the conclusion of the investigation, the Office of the Commissioner found that there was insufficient evidence to support a disciplinary determination against Sano, due to conflicting and inconsistent witness accounts and the absence of contemporaneous substantiation. Barring the receipt of any new information or evidence, the Office of the Commissioner will not impose discipline on Sano in connection with the alleged incident.

Based on the text of the statement, one may conclude that the league did not find Bissen’s claims to be credible.

This is first investigation of this type, or pursuant to its domestic violence policy under the umbrella of which this investigation presumably falls, which has not resulted in discipline of some kind. At least investigations of which the public was aware.