Joba Chamberlain is here in his van to pick up your daughter

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“Is Caitlin ready, Mr. Stevenson? Our reservation is at 7.”

[Mr. Stevenson cocks shotgun, Mrs. Stevenson faints]

source: Getty Images

 

David Price told Jon Morosi that he wouldn’t sign a long term contract with the Yankees due to their draconian facial hair rules. If they do have draconian facial hair rules, it’s only because they have to combat the foul facial hair urges of Joba Chamberlain.

Report: Athletics to acquire Stephen Piscotty from the Cardinals

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Jon Heyman of FanRag Sports reports that the Athletics and Cardinals have agreed on a trade involving outfielder Stephen Piscotty. The Cardinals will receive two as yet unknown minor leaguers in return.

Piscotty, 26, hit .235/.342/.367 with nine home runs and 39 RBI in 401 plate appearances for the Cardinals this past season. He dealt with injuries and with his mother’s ALS diagnosis, so it was a rough year, but very excusably so. The Cardinals had signed him to a six-year, $33.5 million contract extension in March. He’s under contract through 2022 at a total of $29.5 million and has a club option for 2023 worth $15 million with a $1 million buyout.

The Cardinals had an outfield spot open up after agreeing to acquire Marcell Ozuna from the Marlins on Wednesday so the Piscotty trade doesn’t come as a surprise.