Baseball is not a movie. Stop trying to dramatize it.

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I think I stumbled upon the single most significant thing said about the entire baseball-PEDs story. The writer, Tom Verducci, likely did not realize he was saying the most significant thing about it all, but he did all the same.

After correctly noting that athlete after athlete has denied using PEDs in the past, only to later be found to have used them, Verducci says we can’t take anyone’s denial at face value anymore. Why?

… but we have seen how the movie ends too many times.

Thinking of this as a movie — or a grand drama of any kind — is why the discourse about PEDs has become so stupid.  When we think of it as a drama we require heroes and villains. We require quick resolution. We require a stunning, conclusive and emotionally satisfying dénouement.

But baseball isn’t a movie or a play. It’s a sport, played without a script by real living and breathing human beings.  We’ve been conditioned to think of it in dramatic terms because the sporting press developed as a means of dramatizing that which most people didn’t get a chance to see in newspaper accounts, but it is not itself a drama.

When baseball gets into the realm of PEDs and law enforcement our tendency to treat it as a drama is even stronger. Sports are often dramatized, but TV shows and movies have featured cops, doctors and lawyers more than anyone else by a factor of a million.  Put that all together and it’s almost impossible not to think of things like BALCO or the Biogenesis story in the same terms we think of “Law and Order” or “House.”

But that’s not how real life works. In real life stuff happens. If that stuff seems problematic or suspicious, it often, but not always, gets investigated. That stuff may have been motivated by evil, but it may have also been motivated by stupidity or accident or a combination of them all. Or there may be a mistake.  When the stuff gets investigated something approaching justice may result. But just as often nothing may come of it because there are dead ends or nothing particularly bad happened or because everyone just loses interest in the stuff. There may be consequences to it all or it may be meaningless.   It almost always takes a long time to determine whether the stuff meant anything or not.

That reality is really problematic for people who are used to packaging three hour ballgames into 800 word chapters and 162-game seasons into a novel, complete with heroes and villains. Which is why people in that world seem to eager to leap into this sports-legal-medical gumbo and begin to hash out plots.  It’s way easier to do that than to sit back and see what happens and what it all means. If it even means anything.

We let them do that with the games because they are, after all, just games. But when someone’s reputation, fortune, career and sometimes their very freedom is on the line, it doesn’t seem unreasonable to me to expect them to lay the hell off for a bit and let events unfold before they try to stuff them into the little dramatic constructs with which we’re so familiar.

Miguel Cabrera is being sued for reduced child support payments

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Tigers first baseman/DH Miguel Cabrera is being sued by a woman from Orlando, Florida who claims that he “unilaterally” reduced the amount of his monthly child support payments, Tony Paul of The Detroit News reports. Cabrera, who has three children with his wife Rosangel, also had two children with Belkies Mariela Rodriguez in 2013 and 2015.

Cabrera pays more than $6,200 per month in child support and helped Rodriguez purchase a nearly $1 million house. Rodriguez’s attorney calls Cabrera’s monthly payments “inadequate” because her children don’t quite have the same standard of living as Cabrera’s three children with Rosangel. Cabrera’s legal team accused Rodriguez of “embarking on a mission to extort additional moneys to be used for her benefit under the guise of child support.”

Cabrera, 34, signed an eight-year, $248 million contract extension with the Tigers in March 2014, which officially began in 2016. He made $22 million in 2014-15, $28 million in 2016-17, and will earn $30 million from 2018-21 and $32 million in 2022-23.

Along with reduced child support payments, Rodriguez alleges Cabrera left her “high and dry” when it came to monthly expenses with the house he helped her purchase.

Cabrera has requested that the judge recuse herself from his case, as her husband has a title with Rodriguez’s lawyers’ law firm following a merger. He is scheduled to be questioned under oath during a videotaped deposition on Thursday in Orlando. Rodriguez is scheduled for her deposition on Friday.

Cabrera is not the only player to find himself embroiled in such a case. Bartolo Colon was also sued for back child support for a “secret family” last year.