To: THE INTERNET
From: Agent Calcaterra
Re: Agent Neyer
Gentlemen: it has come to my attention that Agent Neyer has publicly doubted the efficacy of THE INTERNET to sway the Hall of Fame voting in favor of our chosen candidates. Apparently he was sleeping when THE INTERNET single handedly took control of the Hall of Fame vote from established baseball writers a few years ago and placed Bert Blyleven in the Hall against the will of THE OLD GUARD.
Whatever the case, this is obviously problematic. If Agent Neyer doubts the efficacy of THE INTERNET to control the process, THE GRAND CONSPIRACY will be imperiled. And you know what that means: Jack Cust will never make it into the Hall of Fame and Hank Aaron will never be removed, which I don’t have to tell you has long been our plan.
All agents are hearby ordered to purge references to Agent Neyer from their computers. When finished, you are to await further instructions from Agents Jaffe and Sheehan.
During the offseason, the Astros finally got rid of Tal’s Hill in center field. It was a throwback to older stadiums, some of which had uneven topography — Crosley Field, namely. As unique as it was in the age of cookie cutter sports stadiums, most of us were holding our collective breaths hoping no one ruptured an Achilles or suffered another brutal injury trying to navigate the hill while attempting to catch a fly ball.
We saw what it looked like during reconstruction:
And now, via Julia Morales of ROOT Sports, we see what it looks like after all the work has been done:
The Astros are allowing fans with Lexus Field Club tickets to stand on the new warning track to watch batting practice and shag fly balls as well, Morales notes. Lexus Field Club is where Tal’s Hill used to be.
Good riddance, Tal’s Hill.
Jhoulys Chacin will start on Opening Day, April 3 against the Dodgers in Los Angeles, Dennis Lin of the San Diego Union-Tribune reports. It will be Chacin’s second Opening Day start, the other coming in 2013 with the Rockies against the Brewers. He’ll be the fifth different Padres pitcher in as many years to start on Opening Day.
Chacin, 29, inked a one-year, $1.75 million contract with the Padres in December. The right-hander spent the 2016 season with the Braves and Angels, compiling an aggregate 4.81 ERA with a 119/55 K/BB ratio in 144 innings.
Lin notes that Chacin will be followed in the rotation by Clayton Richard and Jered Weaver. It will be an interesting rotation, to say the least, as it will arguably be the worst in baseball.