Throw one perfect game and you own Cincinnati forever

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I once met former Reds pitcher Tom Browning at the Home Depot near my house. I thought it didn’t get any better than that, but little did I know:

Former Cincinnati Reds pitcher Tom Browning will get a chance to perfect his chicken dance moves. The city has tapped Browning as grand marshal of its annual Oktoberfest-Zinzinnati, which means leading a mass chicken dance this Saturday on Fountain Square downtown.

The weekend festival celebrates Cincinnati’s German heritage, and tens of thousands of people usually take part.

Ted Power doesn’t get that treatment. Jack Armstrong isn’t leading the chicken dance. You won’t see Scott Scudder as the Grand Marshall. Only Browning. Tom Browning, babies.

Well, according to the article trumpeter Al Hirt, Weird Al Yankovic and Motley Crue frontman Vince Neil have too, but when it comes to late 80s Reds starters, it’s all Browning.

Indians sign Melky Cabrera to a minor league deal

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The Indians have signed free agent outfielder Melky Cabrera to a minor league deal. The pact is pending a physical.

Cabrera, 33, went unsigned this past offseason after putting up a season of .285/.324/.423 with 17 homers and 85 RBI with the White Sox and the Royals.

Cabrera will report to Columbus once he passes his physical and, according to Paul Hoynes, there are no guarantees being made to him that he’ll get playing time. That said, the Indians aren’t getting much outfield production from anyone besides Michael Brantley, and Cabrera’s status as a switch hitter would give Terry Francona some flexibility, so it would not be shocking to see him on the big club after some reps in the minors.