Must-Click Link: The Epic Story of Johnny Damon’s Attempt to Throw a Ball to Home Plate

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If you’re one of those people who like to post comments after non-newsy articles saying “slow news day, huh?” you’ll just want to move along and not read this.

If, however, you are into epic tales of weak-armed outfielders like Johnny Damon, vainly attempting to throw runners out at home plate, this bit of genius from Jon Bois might be up your alley. I’ll give you only the conclusion. The corpus of the stories has to be read in its entirety:

And that is the story of every Johnny Damon throw from the outfield. It’s sure to involve bears, goblins, civil uprisings, spacecraft, underwater observatories, love, hate, revenge, sword fights atop city skyscrapers, fear, hope, and ultimately, dread.

In other words, everything can and will happen. Except for actually throwing the runner out.

And every fan of every team knows of one outfielder who could easily be substituted into that story. Mostly Johnny Damon, but there are some other guys too.

Andrew Miller left Monday’s game due to reaggravation of patella tendinitis

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Indians reliever Andrew Miller lasted only six pitches in Monday night’s appearance against the Red Sox. He walked Mookie Betts on six pitches before being relieved by Dan Otero. Per MLB.com’s Jordan Bastian, Miller reaggravated the patella tendinitis in his right knee.

Miller, 32, missed a couple of weeks earlier this month with patella tendinitis. He was activated last Friday and got two outs in a scoreless appearance against the Royals that night.

Bastian pointed out that Miller’s velocity has been lower than usual. He averaged 92.1 MPH on his fastball on Friday and 90.1 MPH on Monday, well below his normal average around 94 MPH.

The Indians should have more on Miller’s status after Monday’s game or on Tuesday. The lefty is carrying a 1.65 ERA with a 79/16 K/BB ratio in 54 2/3 innings on the season.

Joey Gallo and Matt Bush both experiencing concussion symptoms after colliding on Sunday

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Rangers third baseman Joey Gallo and reliever Matt Bush collided attempting to catch an infield pop-up during Sunday afternoon’s game against the White Sox. Bush was placed on the 10-day disabled list on Monday with an MCL sprain in his right knee. Both he and Gallo are experiencing concussion symptoms, Evan Grant of the Dallas Morning News reports, and Gallo also suffered a nasal fracture. Gallo has not yet been put on the disabled list.

Losing both players is a big loss for the Rangers, who entered Monday’s action just 2.5 games out of the second Wild Card slot.

Gallo, 23, has had a breakout season, batting .205/.329/.561 with 35 home runs, 65 RBI, and 68 runs scored in 410 plate appearances.

Bush, 31, has been solid out of the bullpen, putting up a 3.04 ERA with a 53/18 K/BB ratio in 47 1/3 innings.