Celemens Softball

Roger Clemens won’t be a Texas Ranger


File this under “things that should go without saying,” but Nolan Ryan said it anyway. Because some radio host asked him if the Rangers would be interested in being part of a Roger Clemens comeback:

“I think obviously things will be dictated by how he recovers and if he feels he can go out there and continue throwing and if he can build up some stamina. I think we just have to stay tuned. I might call him, but I don’t think I’ll be calling him about a job.”

Nolan: Hey, Roger, how are ya?

Roger: Good, sir. Calling me about a job?

Nolan: Heck, no. We’re actually playing serious baseball games, son, not running a circus sideshow.

Roger: …

Nolan: Hey, Roger. Know what’s hilarious?

Roger: What?

Nolan: Despite the fact that you were a better pitcher than me by every conceivable measure, if you asked 1000 people, I bet 800 of them would say I was.  Ain’t that a daisy!

Roger: …

Jason Kipnis plans to play through a disgusting-looking ankle sprain

CLEVELAND, OH - OCTOBER 14:  Jason Kipnis #22 of the Cleveland Indians fields the ball against the Toronto Blue Jays during game one of the American League Championship Series at Progressive Field on October 14, 2016 in Cleveland, Ohio.  (Photo by Jason Miller/Getty Images)
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Jason Kipnis sprained his ankle while celebrating the Indians ALCS win over the Blue Jays. In the runup to tonight’s game, Terry Francona has said that Kipnis would be fine, that he’s a gamer, etc., etc. You know, the usual “when the bell rings, all of the aches and pains go away” kind of thing.

Today, however, we see that this sprained ankle is maybe not your run-of-the-mill late season bump or bruise:


Um, yikes.

Indians beat writer jumps in Lake Erie to settle a bet

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Back in September Cleveland Plain Dealer beat writer Paul Hoynes ruffled a lot of feathers when he declared the Indians DOA. His rationale: too many injuries to Indians starters weakened the club too greatly. Even if they did make the playoffs, Hoynes argued, they wouldn’t go far.

A reader made a bet with him at the time: if the Indians didn’t make the World Series, he’d jump in Lake Erie. If they did, Hoynes would.

Today Hoynes made good on his bet. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen a baseball writer drop trou, by the way: