Everyone insists Johan Santana is healthy despite 7.98 ERA

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Johan Santana got rocked for eight runs in 1.1 innings Saturday in his return from the disabled list and now has a 7.98 ERA in nine starts since throwing a no-hitter against the Cardinals on June 1.

Since racking up 134 pitches while making history Santana has allowed 39 runs in 44 innings, serving up 11 homers and a .328 opponents’ batting average while failing to make it beyond five innings in six of his nine starts.

And yet everyone, including Santana, continues to insist that the former Cy Young winner is healthy. Here’s what manager Terry Collins told Conor Orr of the Newark Star Ledger:

I’m planning on, certainly, in five days, seeing him back out there. Any conversations we have about the future, that’s going to be down the road. They’re not gonna be right now. I think Johan’s shoulder is fine, we’ll take a look at him after a few more starts and decide how he’s feeling… but right now, according to me, I have no plans of shutting Johan Santana down.

Here’s the thing, though: Either he’s hurt or he’s just terrible. And which is better, really?

It’s like someone being a complete jerk at a party, making a fool of himself and harassing everyone, and then insisting that he’s not even drunk. OK fine, you’re not drunk, but doesn’t that just mean you’re a huge (sober) jerk? And in Santana’s case, if he’s truly not pitching through more arm problems and still has a 7.98 ERA in his last nine starts … well, that’s hardly any less disturbing.

Video: Corey Dickerson breaks scoreless tie with walk-off home run

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Neither the Pirates nor the Tigers could manage any offense during Thursday afternoon’s game at PNC Park. That is, until outfielder Corey Dickerson launched a walk-off solo home run off of Alex Wilson with one out in the bottom of the ninth inning.

Dickerson, 28, has been solid for the Pirates for the first month of the season. He’s batting .314/.348/.500 with a pair of home runs, 13 RBI, and 13 runs scored in 92 plate appearances. The Pirates acquired him from the Rays in late February in exchange for journeyman pitcher Daniel Hudson and Single-A infielder Tristan Gray.