Chicago Cubs v Atlanta Braves

Someone get Chipper Jones his medication

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Chipper Jones just got his Twitter account a couple of days ago.  He probably never would have gotten one, but someone created a well-followed fake one in recent days, and someone with MLB or the Braves convinced Jones to make an official one so people would know the difference between his and the fake.

It was not expected that he’d actually tweet too much because (a) Chipper Jones is kinda old; and (b) he strikes everyone as the kind of guy who doesn’t have much use for technology more advanced than a rifle scope.

But he has been tweeting a bit lately. And the results are … interesting:

Uh, what?

Nope. I’m more speechless than anything, thanks.

But as a big fan of yours, Chipper, a Braves fan in general and a man well-aware of how hard it is to not look silly as he approaches 40,  I ask that you please hit .400 for the rest of the season and win the World Series while operating under radio silence. You may then retire, take over as Braves manager for Fredi Gonzalez and institute a no-tweeting policy for all of your players.

Thanks!

Rangers sign Carlos Gomez to a one-year, $11.5 million deal

ARLINGTON, TX - OCTOBER 07:  Carlos Gomez #14 of the Texas Rangers looks on in the seventh inning against the Toronto Blue Jays in game two of the American League Divison Series at Globe Life Park in Arlington on October 7, 2016 in Arlington, Texas.  (Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images)
Scott Halleran/Getty Images
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Ken Rosenthal of FOX Sports reports that the Rangers have signed outfielder Carlos Gomez to a one-year deal. Joel Sherman of the New York Post reports that Gomez will earn $11.5 million next season.

Gomez, 31, struggled with the Astros to a .594 OPS before the club released him in mid-August. The Rangers signed him shortly thereafter and were immediately rewarded. Gomez hit .284/.362/.543 with eight home runs and 24 RBI in 130 plate appearances through the end of the regular season.

As presently constructed, Gomez would likely take over in center field with Nomar Mazara handling left and Shin-Soo Choo in right.

Report: Diamondbacks close to signing Fernando Rodney

MIAMI, FL - AUGUST 24: Fernando Rodney #56 of the Miami Marlins celebrates after the game against the Kansas City Royals at Marlins Park on August 24, 2016 in Miami, Florida. (Photo by Rob Foldy/Getty Images)
Rob Foldy/Getty Images
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Jon Heyman of FanRag Sports reports that the Diamondbacks are close to signing free agent reliever Fernando Rodney.

Rodney, 39, has been inconsistent over the past two seasons. This past season, he was lights-out with the Padres, posting a 0.31 ERA in 28 appearances. After the Marlins acquired him at the end of June, he struggled to a 5.89 ERA in 39 appearances.

Brad Ziegler, who closed for the Diamondbacks in the first half last season, went to the Red Sox in a midseason trade and is now a free agent. The Diamondbacks had six other relievers register a save, but only Daniel Hudson and Jake Barrett recorded more than one. Adding Rodney will give the club some stability in the ninth inning.