“What would George Steinbrenner do?” What a ridiculous question

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There’s no sense in sugarcoating it. The Yankees are playing terrible baseball right now. They have lost seven of ten and the offense is in the crapper. Of course it’s early yet, and unless you believe that the Orioles are going to continue to win one-run games all the time and put up big offensive numbers despite striking out a ton and never walking, the Yankees should be back in this thing eventually. But yes, things are bad at the moment.

But no matter how bad things get in the Bronx, could we please dispense with the hacky “If George Steinbrenner were alive he’d …” rebop?  I’m lookin’ at you Wallace Matthews:

This was the kind of night when, in the old Yankee Stadium, George Steinbrenner might have commandeered the PA system to apologize to the fans and maybe offer them a rain check to a future game … In another era, “The Boss” might have grabbed the microphone and apologized for this one, and then stormed into the office to fire someone.

These days, you’ve got to hope the Baby Boss, in his own quiet way, is cooking up something similar.

Yes, because the Yankees’ post-1995 success was totally built on knee-jerk firings as opposed to Steinbrenner, for once in his life, not messing with that which smart baseball people put together. What would George Steinbrenner do?  Probably a bunch of stupid, poorly thought-out things that did way more to generate back page headlines than improve the baseball team. That’s what Steinbrenner would do.

But  sure, if you want to go back to the days when Bob Lemon, Gene Michael, Clyde King and Billy Martin ran around a revolving door and the team didn’t win squat, go right ahead. But that’s not what made the Jeter-era Yankees successful.

The 2012 Yankees are a slumping team that, I suspect, will stop slumping soon and begin crushing the ball again. It’s also possible, on the other hand, that, yes, it’s a team that is suddenly feeling its age and said slump is less aberration than it is the new normal.

But whichever of those things it is, firing people and doing dumb angry things will not help. This is the team Joe Girardi has, and its particular personnel and contractual composition do not make it amenable to quick or easy fixes. You can’t can Girardi and resurrect Billy Martin, nor can you trade A-Rod and Teixeira for Matt Kemp and Clayton Kershaw.  To suggest otherwise is to abdicate anything approaching reasonable analysis in favor of mindless yammering.

Braves sign David Hernandez

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Bill Whitehead of the Atlanta Journal Constitution reports that the Braves have signed reliever David Hernandez to a minor league contract on Sunday. He’ll report to spring training as a non-roster invitee.

Hernandez, who turns 32 years old in May, signed a minor league contract with the Giants in February. He requested and was granted his release on Friday when he learned he wasn’t making the team’s 25-man roster to open the season.

Hernandez pitched for the Phillies last year. He compiled a 3.84 ERA with an 80/32 K/BB ratio in 72 2/3 innings.

Dave Roberts: It “doesn’t make sense” for Scott Kazmir to start year in Dodgers’ rotation

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Scott Kazmir won’t begin the regular season in the Dodgers’ starting rotation. Manager Dave Roberts said after Kazmir’s Cactus League outing on Sunday that it “doesn’t make sense” for the ailing Kazmir to break camp in the rotation, Andy McCullough of the Los Angeles Times reports. The lefty will instead rehab some more and join the rotation at a later time.

Kazmir has been battling a hip issue which has caused his mechanics to suffer. He was clocked in the low 80’s 10 days ago and wasn’t much better on Sunday afternoon.

Last season with the Dodgers, Kazmir posted a 4.56 ERA with a 134/52 K/BB ratio in 136 1/3 innings, his worst numbers since returning to the majors in 2013.