Of course you want to see Pete Rose in a one-man show at an Indiana casino

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“Honey, I’ve narrowed down our options for the weekend getaway.”

“Let’s hear it, dear.”

“Well, we could go to the Caesars Palace Colosseum in Las Vegas and see that big Elton John show, or we could go to that casino in Florence, Indiana and see Pete Rose talk about his life.”

“What are we waiting for? Indiana, ho!”

Pete Rose hits the live stage Friday night at Belterra Casino Resort in what is basically a one-man show billed in various places on the internet as “An Evening With Pete Rose,” or “4,192 — The Making of the Hit King.”

“It’s me telling stories about how I got started playing ball, the impact my father had on me as an athlete, signing with the Reds and right on through the breaking of the (all-time) hit record,” Rose said Tuesday in a telephone interview.

I wouldn’t have the guts to do it myself, but if you and I went to this show, I’d give you ten bucks to ask Pete how it felt to kill Bart Giamatti.

Report: Glen Perkins will retire from baseball

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According to MLB.com’s Rhett Bollinger, Twins GM Thad Levine told 1390 Granite City Sports that reliever Glen Perkins will retire.

Perkins, 34, has battled shoulder injuries over the last two years, limiting him to a total of 7 2/3 innings between 2016-17. His decision doesn’t come as much of a surprise given the circumstances. The Twins declined his $6.5 million club option back in October, making him a free agent.

Across parts of 12 seasons, all with the Twins, Perkins compiled a 3.88 ERA with 120 saves and a 504/158 K/BB ratio in 624 1/3 innings. He ranked among baseball’s best closers from 2013-15, racking up 102 of those saves with a 3.08 ERA. The lefty made the American League All-Star team in each of those three seasons.