The Brewers gave away chorizo lawn ornaments at 5AM

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Remember last year when the Brewers gave away Bernie Brewer statues by hiding them in city parks? And how grubby hoarders hoarded them grubbily? God, that made me hate people more than I usually do.

Well, this morning the Brewers tried again, this time giving away Chorizo (from the sausage race) statues.  Instead of scattering them about parklands, they scattered them in a parking lot at the ballpark, beginning at 5 AM. They were gone in less than two hours:

Like firefighters rushing to a blaze, Milwaukee Brewers fans hurried early Tuesday morning to Miller Park to grab a Chorizo lawn ornament. The fun began at 5 a.m. as word spread online, on radio and television that the Brewers were hosting another collectibles giveaway, this time on the Miller Park grounds …  Media had been alerted ahead of time and were in place at 5 a.m. to watch the rush of fans entering the Molitor Lot, just north of I-94.

By 5:45 a.m., cars were lined up along Story Parkway waiting to get into the parking lot. And by 6:43 a.m., all of the lawn ornaments had been snapped up.

The parking lot location was chosen in order to limit the number of statues each person got, and it was pretty successful. Also: each statue came with a pair of game tickets to the upcoming series against the Giants.

Score one for the earlier risers.

Miguel Cabrera is being sued for reduced child support payments

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Tigers first baseman/DH Miguel Cabrera is being sued by a woman from Orlando, Florida who claims that he “unilaterally” reduced the amount of his monthly child support payments, Tony Paul of The Detroit News reports. Cabrera, who has three children with his wife Rosangel, also had two children with Belkies Mariela Rodriguez in 2013 and 2015.

Cabrera pays more than $6,200 per month in child support and helped Rodriguez purchase a nearly $1 million house. Rodriguez’s attorney calls Cabrera’s monthly payments “inadequate” because her children don’t quite have the same standard of living as Cabrera’s three children with Rosangel. Cabrera’s legal team accused Rodriguez of “embarking on a mission to extort additional moneys to be used for her benefit under the guise of child support.”

Cabrera, 34, signed an eight-year, $248 million contract extension with the Tigers in March 2014, which officially began in 2016. He made $22 million in 2014-15, $28 million in 2016-17, and will earn $30 million from 2018-21 and $32 million in 2022-23.

Along with reduced child support payments, Rodriguez alleges Cabrera left her “high and dry” when it came to monthly expenses with the house he helped her purchase.

Cabrera has requested that the judge recuse herself from his case, as her husband has a title with Rodriguez’s lawyers’ law firm following a merger. He is scheduled to be questioned under oath during a videotaped deposition on Thursday in Orlando. Rodriguez is scheduled for her deposition on Friday.

Cabrera is not the only player to find himself embroiled in such a case. Bartolo Colon was also sued for back child support for a “secret family” last year.