Someone is suing the Marlins, claiming they bought the team for $10 million at an auction

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This is fun. In 2008, Marlins’ president David Samson apparently served as auctioneer at what I can only guess was a charity auction at a Florida Marlins awards banquet at a country club.

At the outset of the auction, he said, in what I can only guess was a joking manner, that the Marlins were the first item up for bid, minimum bid, $10 million.

Then, from the crowd, someone, in what one would reasonably assume was a joking manner, bid $10 million.  I’m sure there were chuckles all around, and then the actual auction began.

Except the guy who bid $10 million now claims that he was serious and is suing the Marlins, claiming that they breached a contract by not selling the team to him for $10 million.  Courtesy of Sport in Law, here’s the lawsuit.

This is why we can’t have nice things, people.

The suit was filed by an actual law firm too, not some weirdo acting on his own twisted behalf.  Here’s hoping that the judge who is assigned to the case is especially cranky the day he or she reads this thing and kicks all kinds of lawyer and plaintiff butt as he or she drums this frivolous complaint out of court.

Imagining Theo Epstein in politics

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“When Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he wept for there were no more worlds to conquer.”

Or: “When Theo Epstein won World Series championships with the two most championship-starved franchises in baseball history, he got bored, and decided to run for the Senate or something.”

That latter bit is the premise of a Politico piece speculating that the Cubs president could go into politics one day. The story features an interview with former Obama chief strategist David Axlerod, who thinks Theo has what it takes. Mostly what he has is fame, popularity, good looks and money. No idea what his positions on issue are, but that other stuff goes a long way in politics these days.

Bonus: given what we just elected last fall, a guy who once had a little temper tantrum and dressed up in a gorilla suit is just as viable a candidate as anyone.

Another interestingly named player is promoted by the Pirates

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When you promote a player from the minors, the first and foremost consideration is whether or not he can help your ball club. But, assuming that’s taken care of, teams should really, really make it a priority to call up dudes with cool sounding names because it makes life more interesting for the rest of us.

The Pirates are doing that. The other night Dovydas Neverauskas made his big league debut. In addition to being the first Lithuanian born-and-raised player in major league history, it’s a solid, solid name. Now the Pirates are making another promotion: Gift Ngoepe.

Yep, Gift Ngoepe. He’s an infielder from South Africa, making the leap to the bigs due to David Freese‘s hamstring injury. Ngoepe, 27, was batting just .241/.308/.379 through 66 plate appearances this season with Triple-A Indianapolis, his ninth in the minors, so he’s not exactly a prospect. But man, that’s a killer name.

It’s also worth mentioning that Gift and Neverauskas were arrested together in a bar fight last August in Toledo, so there is already a good basis for some bonding here.

Good luck, Gift. Gift Ngoepe. Mr. Ngoepe. G-Ngo. Man, I could do this all day.