Whitney Houston

Josh Hamilton: don’t be like Whitney Houston, Mmm-kay?


Pop quiz, hot shot! You have a sports column due tomorrow and can’t think of a topic. Then, suddenly, a big national story erupts in a world that has absolutely nothing to do with sports.  You feel like it’s just too big a leap to make and you hesitate to try to squeeze a sports story out of it.  But you really need to meet deadline. What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO?!

Well, if you’re Patrick Rishe from Forbes, you do this:

Days after Mr. Hamilton’s relapse, the Rangers hired Shayne Kelley to essentially play watchdog to ensure that Mr. Hamilton will stay clean going forward.

Perhaps, Mr. Kelley, you should have Mr. Hamilton sit down and read all about the rise and fall of Ms. Houston.  Have him YouTube some of her best performances when she was at the height of her career, and then look-up photos and videos of her during her troubled times. Because this will remind Mr. Hamilton that nothing is forever and that substance abuse destroys.

Look, that’s not the worst intrusion of non-sports tragedy into the world of sports writing we’ve seen — this is, by far — but it’s pretty awful.

But sure, Josh Hamilton. Don’t be like Whitney.  Now that someone has pointed that out to you, I’m sure you’ll be A-OK.

Miguel Cabrera, Dee Gordon win AL and NL batting titles, respectively

Miguel Cabrera
AP Photo

Tigers first baseman Miguel Cabrera didn’t play in the Tigers’ season finale against the White Sox, but he has officially clinched the AL batting title with a .338 average following Sunday’s action. It’s Cabrera’s fourth batting title in his last five seasons.

Marlins second baseman Dee Gordon entered Sunday’s season finale with a bit more pressure. He was in a tight race with Nationals outfielder Bryce Harper for the NL batting title, trailing only by rounding to the fourth place, .3307 to .3306. Gordon went 3-for-4 in a loss to the Phillies while Harper went 1-for-4 in a loss to the Mets. As a result, Gordon officially won the NL batting title with a .330 average. It’s the first batting title of Gordon’s brief career. Hanley Ramirez was the Marlins’ last batting champion, doing so in 2009.

Report: Angels to announce Billy Eppler as new GM on Monday

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Bill Shaikin of the Los Angeles Times reports that the Angels are expected to announce Billy Eppler as their new general manager on Monday. Eppler had been serving as the assistant general manager with the Yankees.

Jerry DiPoto had been the Angels’ GM but he stepped down on July 1. DiPoto later joined the Red Sox in an advisory role, then was named the Mariners’ new GM last week.

The Angels lost to the Rangers in Sunday’s season finale, which eliminated them from contention for the second AL Wild Card spot. They finished 85-77. Most of their regulars are under contract for the 2016 season, but Eppler will have to decide whether to tender contracts to seven arbitration-eligible players while filling in the rest of the roster.