Jeter walks with girlfriend Kelly at Yankee Stadium after final game

In which I pretend to be above passing along Derek and Minka news even though I’m really not

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I got an email from a publicist a little while ago linking me to a report in “Life & Style Weekly” about Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly being back together. The email said that whoever writes about it “MUST CREDIT LIFE & STYLE WEEKLY.”  So this is credit. Here’s the story over there.  Though, really, you probably want to buy the paper copy, so you can learn why Pippa Middleton is “undateable.”

I mocked all of this on Twitter, but I shouldn’t have. There are people who care about this stuff. And I’m not above getting the page views for linking it, so we’re all a part of the same ugly little celebrity-chasing culture. I’ll own it.

Anyway, in case you care:

… they were seen strolling around the prestigious Musée d’Orsay in Paris on Dec. 29. “They had a guide taking them around on the fifth floor, and they were looking at Monet and the works of other French impressionists,” Pepperdine University student Jaime Olaez, who saw the couple at the art museum, tells Life & Style. “They went to all the different floors; they looked at Van Gogh. Derek was very low-key and was wearing a black-and-gray sweater. Minka looked very pretty. She was wearing white jeans, a brown jacket and boots.”

The Pepperdine student also got audio of their conversation:

Derek: Minka, you’re doing a great job showing me the museum, the Vermeer is quite good, simple, vibrant, but his work definitely fell off as he got older.
Minka: Remind you of anyone?
Derek: And I always confuse Monet and Manet. Now which one married his mistress?
Minka: Monet.
Derek: Right, and then Manet had syphilis.
Minka: They also painted occasionally.

Can I go home yet?  Oh, wait.

Damn.

Keith Law: The Braves have the best farm system. Who has the worst?

PHOENIX, AZ - APRIL 06:  General manager Dave Stewart of the Arizona Diamondbacks laughs on the field before the Opening Day MLB game against the San Francisco Giants at Chase Field on April 6, 2015 in Phoenix, Arizona.  (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)
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Why is this man smiling? Man, I wouldn’t be smiling if I read what I just read.

This is the week when ESPN’s Keith Law releases his prospect and farm system rankings. He kicks off his content this week with a top-to-bottom ranking of all 30 farm systems. As a rule he limits his analysis to players who are currently in the minors and who have not yet exhausted their rookie of the year eligibility.

For the second straight year, Law ranks the Braves as the best system in baseball. Number two — making a big leap from last year’s number 13 ranking – is the New York Yankees. Dead last: the Arizona Diamondbacks, which Law says “Dave Stewart ritually disemboweled” over the past two years. That’s gotta hurt.

If you want to know the reasons and the rankings of everyone in between you’ll have to get an ESPN Insider subscription. Sorry, I know everyone hates to pay for content on the Internet, but Keith and others who do this kind of work put a lot of damn work into it and this is what pays their bills. I typically don’t like to pay for content myself, but I do pay for an ESPN Insider subscription. It’s worth it for Law’s work alone.

The Blue Jays will . . . not be blue some days next year

blue jays logo
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The Toronto Blue Jays, like a lot of teams, will wear an alternate jersey next year. It’ll be for Sunday home games. They call it their “Canadiana,” uniforms. Which, hey, let’s hear it for national pride.

(question to Canada: my grandmother and my three of my four maternal great-grandparents were Canadian. Does that give me any rights to emigrate? You know, just in case? No reason for asking that today. Just curious!).

Anyway, these are the uniforms:

More like RED Jays, am I right?

OK, I am not going to leave this country. I’m going to stay here and fight for what’s right: a Major League Baseball-wide ban on all red alternate jerseys for anyone except the Cincinnati Reds, who make theirs work somehow. All of the rest of them look terrible.

Oh, Canada indeed.