Shaughnessy: the Red Sox are “a doofus organization”

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I know you all hate it when I link Shaughnessy, but if enjoying the living hell out of his particular brand of performance art on a fine Sunday morning is wrong, I don’t want to be right.

Today he has decided not to pick a particular target and instead has gone in for some carpet-bombing.  Francona. Epstein. Papelbon. Beer. Chicken. Managers. Even Heidi Watney.  If any one of those things formed the single basis of a column I’d just roll my eyes and say that’s Dan being Dan. But all together in this bile bouillabaisse?  It’s kinda glorious.

The highlights involve Shaughnessy calling the Red Sox a “doofus organization,” referring to the quest for Terry Francona’s replacement as a “Cirque-de-so-lame managerial search,” and him thinking that Matt Garza would have somehow been fair compensation for Theo Epstein, which is rather insane.

But you know what? Depending on how accurate Shaughnessy’s claim that — contrary to what the Herald is reporting — ownership only pivoted to Bobby Valentine now rather than had him in mind all along, he may very well have a damn fine point about the organizational disarray.

And even if he’s not: this is really fun to read on some sick level. At least if you’re not a Boston fan.

Yasmany Tomas arrested for reckless driving and criminal speeding

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KTAR News is reporting that Diamondbacks outfielder Yasmany Tomas was arrested on Thursday morning for driving faster than 100 MPH, according to the Arizona Department of Public Safety. He was charged with reckless driving and criminal speeding.

The maximum sentence for a criminal speeding charge is up to 30 days in jail and a fine up to $500. It is considered a Class 3 misdemeanor. Tomas may also have his license suspended.

A Diamondbacks spokesperson said, “We are very disappointed to learn of this news. We are still gathering facts, and will refrain from further comment at this time as this is a pending legal matter.”

Tomas, 27, signed a six-year, $68.5 million contract with the Diamondbacks in December 2014 as an amateur free agent out of Cuba. He has mostly disappointed, owning a .769 OPS while playing subpar defense in the outfield as well as at third base, where the club briefly tried him. He battled a groin injury for most of the past season and ultimately underwent core muscle surgery in August.