The Giants are trying to shoo the seagulls away


She swallowed the spider to catch the fly, but I don’t know why she swallowed the fly. I guess she’ll die:

For years, the San Francisco Giants’ regular seagulls cooperated so nicely: They flocked to AT&T Park after the final out to scavenge for treats like leftover popcorn, pizza or garlic fries.

Those gulls have become more pesky and plentiful of late, creating a problem for fans during games on occasion this season. So, now, the Giants are considering bringing in a resident falcon to help fend off the birds and keep them at bay out where they belong – above the bay.

This happens at a ballpark or two every year. And while I understand how nature works, I do always find it funny that the solution to a pest is to invite a killer bird of prey into a building with 40,000 people in it every day.

And as a result of watching way too many bad movies in my youth, I always wonder (hope?) that the falcon will develop a taste for human flesh and turn on its keepers and the fans at large.  They then bring in some old shaman-type stock character (played by a fading actor who made a couple of decent movies in the 70s but is now down on his luck) who claims to know the ways of the Falcon,* and he too is eaten. As is always the case, the day is saved by some plucky teenagers.

*Note: “Ways of the Falcon” would be an excellent title for this direct-to-video feature.

Royals sign Justin Grimm to a one-year, $1.25 million deal

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The Royals signed free agent reliever Justin Grimm to a one-year, $12.5 million deal, the club announced Sunday. Grimm can earn up to $300,000 in additional incentives, the specifics of which have yet to be disclosed.

The 29-year-old right-hander was released by the Cubs on Thursday. Prior to his release, he was slated to make $2.2 million after losing his arbitration case against the team. Grimm polished off a five-year campaign with the Cubs in 2017 and produced an unimpressive 5.53 ERA, 4.4 BB/9 and 9.6 SO/9 over 55 1/3 innings.

In a corresponding move, right-hander Sam Gaviglio was designated for assignment. He pitched in five games for the Royals this spring, racking up 13 hits, eight runs and seven strikeouts in seven innings.