Jose Canseco loves Lady Gaga and “would marry her in a second”

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In the surest sign yet that he’s gone crazy, Jose Canseco took to Twitter yesterday and wrote that he’d marry Lady Gaga “in a second.”

Here’s more late-night tweeting from Canseco:

I love lady gaga wish I could meet her .would marry her in a second

Lady gaga is the truth get use to it

Her song Judas is what we fight with everyday since we are born evil

I am her night in baseball armor

She is the queen

Fantastic.

I actually think they’re perfect for each other, in the same sense that a car going 100 miles per hour and a brick wall are a perfect combination for an accident. Lady Gaga could not be reached for comment, as she was busy being hatched out of an egg.

Red Sox Triple-A team to ban people named Tyler and Austin from stadium on May 5 and 6 as part of promotion

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The Pawtucket Red Sox, obviously the Triple-A affiliate of the Red Sox, have come up with an interesting promotion for the weekend of May 5 and 6, when they host the Yankees’ Triple-A team from Scranton/Wilkes-Barre.

This, of course, references last week’s benches-clearing fracas between the Red Sox and Yankees that involved Joe Kelly and Tyler Austin. Kelly slid hard into second base, which upset Brock Holt. The benches emptied as the two jawed at each other, but no punches were thrown. Later in the game, Kelly threw at Austin and the benches emptied again. Punches were thrown this time and both players were given suspensions.

The major league Red Sox visit the Yankees May 8-10. As far as we’re aware, people named Joe or Kelly are allowed to attend.