Willy Aybar was imprisoned for beating his wife back in January

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This morning I made a joke about Willy Aybar signing with Edmonton in the independent leagues, saying that he was being sent to baseball Siberia. Well, if this report is true, baseball Siberia is way too good for him.  Real Siberia is too good for him.  Frankly, he can take a flying leap into the abyss for all I care:

Yesterday Willy Aybar signed with the Edmonton Capitals of the Independent North American League. We had been wondering why no Major League team would even give Aybar a minor league deal. Turns out it was because Aybar was sentenced to three months in prison in the Dominican Republic after he beat his wife. Aybar’s wife ended up in intensive care for an extended period of time, in critical condition.

That comes from Rays Index, which has a translation of a Dominican Republic news report from back in January. Rays Index infers from the article that Aybar just signed because he was only released from jail a few weeks ago and speculates that he was signed in Canada because he may have had trouble getting a visa to come to the United States given his record.

I don’t know how any of that works. All I know for sure is that I hope to never see Willie Aybar in the major leagues again.

Someone stole the bat from the Ken Griffey, Jr. statue at Safeco Field

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The Mariners unveiled a statue of Hall of Fame outfielder Ken Griffey, Jr. earlier this year at Safeco Field, featuring the slugger in his famous follow-through seen after each of his 630 career home runs. Chris Daniels of KING 5 News in Seattle reported on Tuesday evening that someone had stolen the bat from the statue.

Thankfully, the Seattle Police Department announced that the bat has been recovered and a suspect has been arrested. They expect to provide more details later. Daniels reports the Mariners have confirmed the news.

My fellow Americans, our long national nightmare is over.