The New York Post, abdicating most of whatever residual claim it had to being a news outlet as opposed to an entertainment outlet, decided to give recently-indicted sad sack Lenny Dykstra a column today. You will not be at all surprised to learn that it contains all of the usual cliches one hears from recently-indicted sad sacks who feel it necessary to go on a P.R. blitz:
- The delusion that his current struggles are part of some divine plan rather than his own greed and mendacity;
- The claim that the U.S. Attorney and the FBI are out to get him; and
- The claim that his indictment is a wonderful thing because now it allows him to tell his story;
Maybe God does have plans for people. Yes, the U.S. Attorney and the FBI do sometimes go after people. Yes, sometimes the innocent truly are set free because they finally are given a voice in a court of law. I just kind of doubt that any of these are the case with Lenny Dykstra.
Less humorously, Dykstra claims that he has been tortured — yes, he actually uses that term — and says that he was “physically and mentally assaulted” in police custody. Which is an insult to the very real victims of very real torture and police brutality here and elsewhere. Torture victims don’t write op-eds in the New York Post joking about their exploits in Shea Stadium and parsing the nature of grand theft auto based on the fact that the car involved “was only a Ford Flex.” If you were truly tortured, Dykstra, get a lawyer, register a complaint with the proper authorities and do your best to endure until your nightmare is over. Don’t pound your chest in the pages of the Post.
All of that said, I actually agree with Dykstra on one point. It’s when he says “I did not get stupid overnight.” No Lenny, you didn’t. Because that implies that there has been some sort of change in this particular metric, and of that I see no evidence whatsoever.
Albert Pujols kicked things off for the Angels in dramatic fashion on Friday night, cranking a two-RBI home run off of the Orioles’ Jeremy Hellickson to give the club an early lead in the first inning. The 350-footer was his 18th home run of the year and No. 609 in his 17-season career, tying Sammy Sosa on the all-time home run list for eighth overall and most home runs hit by a player born outside of the United States.
With the home run, Pujols sits just three homers shy of tying Jim Thome’s 612-home run record for seventh on the all-time list. That figures to be the last major milestone still ahead of the designated hitter this season, with Ken Griffey Jr.’s 630-home run mark still a distant 21 blasts away.
The Angels, meanwhile, ran with Pujols’ lead, collecting home runs from Kole Calhoun, C.J. Cron, Kaleb Cowart and Mike Trout. It wasn’t quite enough to quash the Orioles, however, who surged to a 9-7 finale after Manny Machado went 3-for-5 with three home runs and struck a walk-off grand slam in the bottom of the ninth.
The Nationals placed right-hander Max Scherzer on the 10-day disabled list with left neck inflammation, the team announced Friday. Scherzer was scratched from his scheduled start against the Padres and replaced by left-hander Matt Grace, though an official roster move has yet to be made to fill his spot on the roster. The assignment is retroactive to August 15.
Scherzer experienced a similar pain on the right side of his neck at the start of the month, though this is the first official stint he’ll serve on the disabled list in 2017. While comments from club manager Dusty Baker suggest that the injury wasn’t caused by any particular trauma, it seems likely that the ace right-hander will be sidelined for at least one more start.
It’s a terrible time to lose a star pitcher, especially with the Nationals positioned to make a deep run in the postseason, but their 14-game cushion in the NL East should buy them some time while Scherzer’s on the mend. Prior to his bout of inflammation, the 33-year-old looked remarkably healthy this season. He pitched through his fifth consecutive All-Star campaign and currently boasts a 12-5 record in 24 starts, complete with a 2.25 ERA (good for second-best among qualified starters), 2.2 BB/9 and 12.3 SO/9 in 160 1/3 innings.