And That Happened: Sunday’s scores and highlights

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Yankees 12, Rangers 5:  We read a lot of “Derek Jeter is done” commentary last week. Well, whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that Jeter was only mostly dead. And there’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Two homers for The Captain.  As for the game overall, I’ll quote Jay Jaffe, who said it best on Twitter late yesterday afternoon: “This Yankees-Rangers game is so ugly they should shave its ass and teach it to walk backwards.”

Braves 5, Phillies 2: Jair Jurrjens continues to impress, allowing one run on eight hits in six and a third. The long ball did Philly in, with Cole Hamels giving up dingers to Alex Gonzalez and Freddie Freeman and Michael Stutes allowing a two-run job to Eric Hinske.  The Braves take two of three from the Philly in Citizens Bank Park. This has apparently frightened and confused these two gentlemen, respectively.

Marlins 8, Nationals 0: Anibal Sanchez lost a no-hitter in the seventh, but it was probably for the best given that he took 117 pitches to finish those seven innings. No savvy manager would have let him go the distance at those rates and then we’d either end up talking about how Edwin Rodriguez abused Sanchez or how heartless Edwin Rodriguez was to deprive everyone of a possible no-hitter had he yanked Sanchez. Personally, everyone should be happy with a two-hit, 11K, no runs performance. Well, everyone except Nats fans, but they’re used to disappointment by now.

Angels 6, Indians 5: Mike Scioscia’s 1000th career win.  In the game story afterward, this quote appeared: “‘I’m glad to be a part of such a special occasion for Sosh,’ Hunter said.”  I would have bet my life that you spelled that “Scioc.” Or, in a tip o’ the cap to “The Outsiders,” “Soc.”

Dodgers 4, Mets 2: Andre Ethier has a one-game hitting streak (2 for 4, HR, 2 RBI).

Rays 5, Orioles 3: B.J. Upton made a wise choice to appeal his two-game suspension, because he absolutely destroyed Orioles pitching in this series, going 7 for 14 with eight RBI.

Pirates 5, Astros 4: Both bullpens blew late leads, but Houston’s did it last. Ryan Doumit with the three-run homer in the eighth. Pittsburgh is at .500, y’all.

Red Sox 9, Twins 5: It looked like it was going to be a classic Daisuke Matsuzaka outing after the first inning, in which he gave up three runs on approximately 2,430 pitches. But he settled down and went six serviceable innings. Which was more than enough with Carl Pavano dropping the stank on the other side (5 IP, 10 H, 7 ER).

Giants 3, Rockies 0: The Giants have just owned the Rockies lately, winning nine of eleven and sweeping this series. All three of San Francisco’s runs were driven in by Cody Ross.

Padres 4, Diamondbacks 3: Four first inning runs for the Padres had to make Aaron Harang and the rest of the staff feel like they were staked to 100.

White Sox 5, Mariners 2: The White Sox manage their first series win in a month, taking two of three from the M’s. Paul Konerko had five hits. Not bad for a guy who left Saturday’s game with a sore hand.

Reds 2, Cubs 0: The return of Homer Bailey last week and Johnny Cueto’s sharp season debut yesterday (6 IP, 5 H, 0 ER)  have to be a big shot in the arm for a struggling Reds’ rotation.

Cardinals 3, Brewers 1: Beer Bowl. Kyle McClellan took a shutout into the ninth, watched as Eduardo Sanchez allowed an inherited runner to score and put a couple more of his own on base, but snagged his fifth win anyway.

Athletics 5, Royals 2: You can watch baseball games for 30+ years and yet you can still see stuff you’ve never seen before. Like this play by Tyson Ross.

Tigers 5, Blues Jays 2: Austin Jackson hit a tie-breaking two-run homer in the seventh to continue what has been a pretty nice hot streak for him, hitting .368 over his last ten games.

Giancarlo Stanton will defend his Home Run Derby title

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The Marlins announced on Sunday that outfielder Giancarlo Stanton will defend his Home Run Derby title when the city of Miami host’s the All-Star Game festivities next month.

Stanton, 27, defeated Todd Frazier in the finals of last year’s Home Run Derby at Petco Park, hitting 20 home runs to Frazier’s 13. Stanton hit a total of 61 home runs in the Derby. This will be the third Home Run Derby in which Stanton has participated.

Stanton also went 1-for-3 with a solo home run to help the Marlins defeat the Cubs 4-2 on Sunday. He’s now batting .274/.357/.551 with 20 home runs and 49 RBI in 311 plate appearances.

Aaron Hicks to go on the disabled list with an oblique injury

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Yankees outfielder Aaron Hicks left Sunday’s game against the Rangers after four innings due to soreness in his right oblique. After the game, Hicks said he expects to go on the 10-day disabled list and miss the next three to four weeks, MLB.com’s Bryan Hoch reports.

Hicks was 1-for-2 with a single before departing on Sunday. He entered the game batting .288/.397/.515 with 10 home runs and 37 RBI in 198 plate appearances. It is by far the best season of his career.

Jacoby Ellsbury is on his way back from a concussion, so the Yankees will only have to bridge the gap in center field for a week or two. Mason Williams could draw some starts in center field in the meantime.