Jose Reyes, Nate McLouth

The 2011 Braves are really freakin slow

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33 games into the season, the Braves are a remarkable 5-for-15 stealing bases. Now they’re not the only team in single digits when it comes to steals: the Cubs have just one more stolen base on the season. But to have been caught on two-thirds of their attempts makes this an historically awful start.

The Braves are currently on pace for 25 steals, which would be the lowest total since the Mets had 25 in 1994. The last team to finish with fewer than 25 steals were the 1973 Pirates, with 23.

Of course, the Braves aren’t really that bad. But unless they pick it up, they will join this list of the teams with the worst steal percentages since 2005:

Nationals 2005: 45/45 – 50.0%
Athletics 2005: 31/22 – 58.5%
Braves 2006: 52/35 – 59.8%
Tigers 2006: 60/40 – 60.0%
Royals 2005: 53/33 – 61.6%
Cubs 2009: 56/34 – 62.2%
Dodgers 2005: 58/35 – 62.4%
Cubs 2005: 65/39 – 62.5%
Indians 2007: 72/41 – 62.8%
Cardinals 2007: 56/33 – 62.9%
Rockies 2006: 85/50 – 63.0%
Giants 2010: 55/32 – 63.2%
Indians 2005: 62/36 – 63.3%
White Sox 2007: 78/45 – 63.4%
Cubs 2010: 55/31 – 63.9%
Royals 2007: 78/44 – 63.9%

The 2011 White Sox are also threatening an appearance, thanks largely to Juan Pierre’s awful start. They’re 18-for-36 stealing bases in the early going.

It’s hard to imagine the Braves finishing short of 30 steals, but they might fail to reach 40 unless they bring in some speed later on. The last team to steal fewer than 40 bases was the 2008 Padres.

Of course, the Braves can take heart that a team doesn’t need to be particularly good at stealing bases to win. Note the presence of the 2010 Giants on the list above.

Warren G just gave the worst performance of “Take me out the ballgame” ever

Warren G performs at the Warren G NYC Takeover album release party at the Highline Ballroom on Sunday, Aug. 9, 2015, in New York. (Photo by Andy Kropa/Invision/AP)
Associated Press
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It was just over 22 years ago that “Regulate” was released. Amazing track. One of the best. At least according to me and all of the other 40-something white dudes who liked to act cooler than we really were in the 90s, which is all of us.

A lot has happened since then. Nate Dogg died (RIP). Other major figures of west coast hip hop turned into moguls or family friendly movie stars. Everyone’s older. But part of me wonders if any of them are still on the cutting edge in some way or another, either as performers or artists or just as a matter of their own personal stance. Sometimes I wonder if any of them, like so many other artists who came before them, can have a career renaissance in their 40s and 50s.

Maybe. But not Warren G. Man, seriously not Warren G.

 

Here’s to better times:

The Diamondbacks read mean tweets about their new uniforms

Arizona Diamondbacks starting pitcher Shelby Miller throws in the first inning against the San Diego Padres in a baseball game Saturday, April 16, 2016, in San Diego. Miller left the game in the second inning after he injured his throwing hand when his follow through hit the mound. (AP Photo/Lenny Ignelzi)
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I’m on record as not being a big fan of the Diamondbacks’ many, many new uniforms. Not my cup of tea in either color or style, to be honest. I’ve even tweeted some negative things about them.

Thankfully, however, the Dbacks social media folks either didn’t see my tweets or didn’t take too much issue with them. They did with many other people’s, however, including some baseball writers I know. And then they read them and riffed on ’em.

Glad everyone has a sense of humor here.

MRI reveals minor right ankle sprain for Cubs’ Kris Bryant

Chicago Cubs' Kris Bryant warms up before Game 3 of the National League baseball championship series against the New York Mets Tuesday, Oct. 20, 2015, in Chicago. (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)
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CHICAGO (AP) An MRI has confirmed that Kris Bryant of the Chicago Cubs has a minor right ankle sprain.

The 2015 NL Rookie of the Year wasn’t in the lineup Friday against the Atlanta Braves, but manager Joe Maddon said he might be available off the bench late in the game.

Bryant was injured running the bases in the third inning Thursday of Chicago’s 7-2 victory over the Milwaukee Brewers. He was replaced in left field two innings later.

The Cubs avoided putting another starter on the disabled list. Catcher Miguel Montero was placed on the 15-day DL on Thursday with a sore back. Chicago lost slugger Kyle Schwarber for the season when he tore two knee ligaments three weeks ago in Arizona.

Yasiel Puig welcomes Jared Goff to Los Angeles

Los Angeles Dodgers' Yasiel Puig smiles as he warms up throwing the baseball during a spring training baseball workout Friday, Feb. 26, 2016, in Glendale, Ariz. (AP Photo/Ross D. Franklin)
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Jared Goff, the University of California Quarterback, was selected by the Los Angeles Rams as the first overall pick of last night’s draft. Not a bad thing to happen, to the man. He’s going to be rich! He’s going to be even more famous! He’s going to be the face of the NFL’s move back into the nation’s second largest city!

The only problem is that he’s not always been a fan of all things Los Angeles. For example, three years ago he took issue with Yasiel Puig for reasons that I’m guessing everyone has forgotten:

But no worries. Puig has both forgotten and forgiven. He even sent out a warm welcome to the new Angelino this afternoon:

#PuigYourFriend has to the best hashtag in the history of Twitter.