Major League Baseball is going to have an “All-Star Charity Dance-a-Thon.”

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What’s the matter, Othello, jealous?

Well, did you know there’s a swimming pool under this floor?

And did you know that button behind you causes this floor to open up?

And did you further know that George Bailey is dancing right over that crack?

And I’ve got the key?

Stand back, everybody! Stand back!

They’re cheering us! We must be good!

Major League Baseball today announced the creation of a new All-Star Summer event, the All-Star Charity Dance-A-Thon, which will take place on Saturday, July 9, 2011 at the Phoenix Convention Center. All event-related net proceeds will be donated equally to three charities supporting cancer research and education — the Prostate Cancer Foundation, Stand Up To Cancer and Susan G. Komen for the Cure.

Glee’s very own acclaimed choreographer, Zach Woodlee, will lead the crowd in coordinated and spontaneous dance moves. He and other VIP guests will also serve as judges for a soon-to-be announced contest that will be open to Dance-A-Thon attendees. The grand prize winner of the contest will win an exclusive meet-and-greet opportunity on the set of Glee.

The last two All-Star Games had 5K charity races which, I assume, was considered a non-starter in Phoenix in July.  The Dance-a-Thon gives them another charity vehicle to tie into the All-Star Game in which averages Joe’s like you and me can participate if we wish, this time with air conditioning. Assuming Average Joe’s like you and me would be interested in a meet-and-greet opportunity on the set of Glee, which is by no means a given.

Buffalo gals, can’t you come out tonight …

Cardinals acquire Marcell Ozuna from the Marlins

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The St. Louis Cardinals have acquired Marcell Ozuna from the Miami Marlins. Craig Mish of Sirius XM was the first to report that the deal was done. Ozuna still has to take a physical.

There is no report yet about what the Cards had to give up to get Ozuna, but given that the Cards and Marlins put a deal together for Giancarlo Stanton, the sides certainly have discussed various Cards prospects recently.

Ozuna fills a major need for the Cardinals, who had serious weaknesses in the middle of the order in 2017. Last year their number three hitters hit a combined .246/.338/.425 and their cleanup hitters hit 270/.350/.444. Ozuna, 27, had a fantastic offensive year in 2017, hitting .312/.376/.548 with 37 home runs and 124 RBI in 159 games.

Ozuna made $3.5 million this past season and is due for arbitration this offseason. He is under contractual control through 2019.