“Free” donuts cost Astros fan $237 (and the “donut” versus “doughnut” debate rages on)

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Throughout each day Craig and I “claim” stories to write about. For instance, I’ll instant message him and say, “I’ll take the David Purcey trade” and then he’ll say something like, “OK, sucker.”

However, sometimes there’s no claiming necessary. If there’s a story involving bourbon he gets it and if there’s a story about donuts I get it.

So here’s this beauty from the Houston Chronicle

Bob Choate, a 56-year-old Astros fan, won a “year’s supply of donuts” while attending fan appreciation day at Minute Maid Park last October. In my case that would likely involve approximately 25,000 donuts, putting Shipley’s Do-Nuts in Houston out of business, but per the rules of the contest he instead received 315 coupons for a donut-and-coffee combination worth around $3 apiece.

As if insulting a person’s ability to eat significantly more than 315 donuts in one calendar year wasn’t bad enough, Choate had to declare the prize value on his taxes and that ended up costing him $237. And he hasn’t used even 10 of the coupons yet. Despicable.

Anyway, there’s a somewhat happy ending to the story, which is that the owner of Shipley’s Do-Nuts reimbursed the $237, Choate also agreed to make a matching donation of $237 to charity, and the Astros gave him a signed Jeff Bagwell baseball and four tickets for his troubles.

Add it all up and the guy has essentially spent $237 on an autographed baseball, four Astros tickets, eight donuts, and eight cups of coffee, which seems like kind of a ripoff for a “prize” unless you’re one of those weirdos who enjoys donating to charity and being a good person.

On a related note: By reading the Houston Chronicle article about this whole situation and Deadspin’s amusing parsing of the story, I just realized that a large percentage of the country spells them “doughnuts” rather than “donuts.” As you can tell by the preceding paragraphs I refuse to be one of those people (I’m a food rebel, as established previously), but the idea that the alternate spelling went unnoticed by me, one of the world’s foremost donut/doughnut consumers, for the past 28 years is mind blowing.

Steven Matz underwent season-ending surgery

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Steven Matz underwent season-ending surgery on his left elbow today. The procedure was to reposition a compressed nerve in his elbow.

Matz, 26, has struggled over 13 starts, posting a 6.08 ERA with a 48/19 K/BB ratio in 66.2 innings. That line was, obviously, a function of the bum nerve in the bum elbow. Trouble aside, Matz is expected to be ready for Opening Day in 2018.

The Mariners Designate Leonys Martin for Assignment. Again.

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Back in April the Mariners designated outfielder Leonys Martin for assignment. He cleared waivers, accepted an assignment to Triple-A Tacoma and proceeded to hit .312/.352/.506 in 84 minor league games, leading to the Mariners calling him up on July 30.

In 19 games since then he’s hit a bit better than he did back in April, but not great: .230/.266/.426. So they just designated him for assignment again. The Rainers only have six more games this season, so he’s likely not going back there. Given that he’s arbitration eligible and the M’s are unlikely to tender him a contract, he’s likely to elect free agency once he clears waivers. Which he will, because he’s making nearly $5 million this year.

Odd year for Martin, who will likely be competing for a roster spot someplace next spring.