Jose Canseco’s twin brother Ozzie tried to impersonate him at a “celebrity boxing” fight

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Jose Canseco failed to show up for a fight against Billy Padden in front of 400 paying customers Saturday at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Florida and instead sent his twin brother Ozzie Canseco, according to “Celebrity Boxing” promoter Damon Feldman.

An employee of “Celebrity Boxing” told Luis Sanchez of El Nuevo Herald that they discovered it was the Canseco with zero career homers rather than the Canseco with 462 career homers when Ozzie “took off his shirt and didn’t have Jose’s tattoos on the biceps that appear in our advertising.”

Jose was paid $10,000 for the fight. He received a wire transfer of $5,000 beforehand and then got a check for $5,000 at the event, which he (or Ozzie) refused and instead insisted be made out to “cash.” Once the attempted switch was discovered the person claiming to be Jose refused to return the money and then the actual Jose didn’t return phone calls seeking comment.

However, he did post a bunch of stuff related to the event on Twitter:

Be very careful with Damon feldman who runs celebrity boxing he will not pay you if you fight for him

Damon feldman will not fulfil his part of the bargain

let’s see who is smart enough to figure out what happened at the boxing match

is anyone out there smart enough to figure it out or are you all a bunch of hateful morons

the truth is always hidden from the public to create villains and heroes which 1 are you truly

seek the truth before reacting

just remember the media is write 20 percent of 50 percent of the time

how can you haters being so ignorant it’s amazing

I am still waiting for an intelligent scenario

First of all, to misspell “right” as “write” in a criticism of the media is either brilliant or the dumbest thing of all time. Beyond that, his daring people to “figure out what happened at the boxing match” and later writing “I am still waiting for an intelligent scenario” makes me think Canseco is just hoping someone suggests a scenario so good that he can actually use it as an excuse.

Also, this whole thing reads like a super depressing, down on your luck version of all the kids movies where identical twins switch places with each other at school one day and the teachers never notice a thing. In this version one twin is being paid $10,000 to get beat up in front of 400 people and the other twin is willing to get beat up in his place for what is presumably less than the full $10,000. Oh, and the whole thing falls apart over tattoos, which is maybe the most fitting aspect of the entire story.

I don’t say as much crazy stuff as Canseco, but you can follow me on Twitter too. And you can be sure my twin brother isn’t the one writing the tweets.

Report: Christian Yelich’s relationship with Marlins ‘irretrievably broken’

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Joe Longo, the agent of Marlins outfielder Christian Yelich, said his client’s relationship with the Marlins is “irretrievably broken,” ESPN’s Jerry Crasnick reports. He believes in the best interest of both Yelich and the Marlins to work out a trade before the start of spring training.

Longo said,

They have a plan. I respect that plan, but that plan shouldn’t include Christian at this point in his career. He’s in the middle of the best years of his career, and having him be part of a 100-loss season is not really where [we] want to see him going.

The relationship between player and team is irretrievably broken. It’s soured. He’s part of the old ownership regime. The new ownership regime needs to get new parts into this plan and move forward, and he needs to get on with his career where he’s got a chance to win. The big issue is him winning and winning now.

He loves the city of Miami. He loves the fans. He’s had nothing but a good experience in South Florida, and he feels sorry where they ended up. But I think having him report [to spring training] and attempting to include him moving forward is going to be uncomfortable for both sides. I don’t see how it’s going to work.

This certainly comes as no surprise considering the offseason the Marlins have had after installing new ownership, going from Jeffrey Loria to Bruce Sherman and Derek Jeter. The club traded All-Star outfielder Giancarlo Stanton, who hit 59 home runs last season, as well as Dee Gordon and Marcell Ozuna. As Crasnick notes, Yelich isn’t the only player to express disappointment with the Marlins’ current direction — J.T. Realmuto and Starlin Castro have as well.

Yelich, 26, signed a seven-year, $49.57 million contract extension with the Marlins in March of 2015. Given his career performance, that’s a bargain of a contract, which is why more than a handful of teams have inquired with the Marlins about him this offseason. Yelich finished the past season with a .282/.369/.439 triple-slash line along with 18 home runs, 81 RBI, 100 runs scored, and 16 stolen bases in 695 plate appearances.