Chipper Jones believes the U.S. government whacked JFK

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I’m about as likely to listen to Chipper Jones’ theories on the JFK assassination as I am to listen to Luke Scott’s theories about President Obama’s place of birth, but for those of you who demand more of your baseball players than mere athletic prowess, please know that Jones does, indeed, have a theory. At least a broad one, which he told to Dan Scholssberg of The Post Game:

“Having shot a hunting rifle all my life, I personally believe there was more than one shooter. The conspiracy behind it is what really intrigues me. I’m sure it went pretty high but I don’t know how high. Let’s just say somebody had to put it into motion—and it was somebody high-ranking in the U.S. government.”

Whatever you say, Chip. For my part I put more stock in James Ellroy’s theory as described in “American Tabloid.” It’s complicated, but let’s just say that you do not want to steal heroin from the mob as a way of taking revenge against them for failing to back you in your plan to assassinate Fidel Castro following your failure in the Bay of Pigs invasion. Because if you do, they’ll make you kill Jack the Haircut as payback, get me?

Or else it was Rand Corporation, in conjunction with the saucer people, under the supervision of the reverse vampires.  I could go either way with it.

Nolan Reimold retires

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Former Orioles outfielder Nolan Reimold has retired, Michael Pfaff — president of the Long Island Ducks — announced on Twitter on Sunday.

Reimold, 33, was hitting .238/.359/.397 in 78 plate appearances with the Ducks. He was coming off of a disappointing 2016 campaign as a reserve outfielder with the O’s, finishing with a .664 OPS.

Over parts of eight seasons in the majors, Reimold hit .246/.323/.422 with 56 home runs and 174 RBI.

Mike Trout sprains thumb, to undergo MRI on Monday

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Angels outfielder Mike Trout sprained his left thumb and had to leave Sunday’s game against the Marlins. He underwent an X-ray, which revealed no fracture, but he is set to have an MRI on Monday for further evaluation, Jeff Fletcher of the Orange County Register reports.

Trout went 0-for-2 with a walk before exiting. The reigning AL MVP is batting .337/.461/.742 with 16 home runs, 36 RBI, 36 runs scored, and 10 stolen bases in 206 plate appearances this season. Needless to say, losing him for any amount of time would be a devastating loss for the Angels, who are 26-27 and tied for second place in the AL West.