La Russa closeup

Highlights from the Tony La Russa roast

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Last month we learned that the St. Louis chapter of the BBWAA was going to have a roast of Tony La Russa.  Well, it happened last week, and FOXSportsMidwest.com has some of the highlights of it here.

The profanity is bleeped out, but it does get a tad blue.  There’s a good J.D. Drew joke by Steve Kline that was, sadly, kind of messed up in the delivery.  Kline makes up for it with a better Brendan Ryan joke that made me laugh.  Bobby Knight does a recurring telephone gag and talks about bird poop a great deal. Jim Leyland tells a story about he and is wife in bed in which he says “so I start feelin’ around a little bit and, lo and behold, my wife was kinda linin’ it!”  Probably didn’t need to hear that, but it led to a nice joke.

The highlight was the fake Harry Caray-fake Tony La Russa interview near the end.  It was supposed to take place in the early 80s. It is so shockingly true to life that I’m surprised that the real La Russa didn’t stand up and punch someone.

FOX Sports Midwest is going to air this Friday night at 8 p.m. central time if you’re in the neighborhood.

Keith Law: The Braves have the best farm system. Who has the worst?

PHOENIX, AZ - APRIL 06:  General manager Dave Stewart of the Arizona Diamondbacks laughs on the field before the Opening Day MLB game against the San Francisco Giants at Chase Field on April 6, 2015 in Phoenix, Arizona.  (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)
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Why is this man smiling? Man, I wouldn’t be smiling if I read what I just read.

This is the week when ESPN’s Keith Law releases his prospect and farm system rankings. He kicks off his content this week with a top-to-bottom ranking of all 30 farm systems. As a rule he limits his analysis to players who are currently in the minors and who have not yet exhausted their rookie of the year eligibility.

For the second straight year, Law ranks the Braves as the best system in baseball. Number two — making a big leap from last year’s number 13 ranking – is the New York Yankees. Dead last: the Arizona Diamondbacks, which Law says “Dave Stewart ritually disemboweled” over the past two years. That’s gotta hurt.

If you want to know the reasons and the rankings of everyone in between you’ll have to get an ESPN Insider subscription. Sorry, I know everyone hates to pay for content on the Internet, but Keith and others who do this kind of work put a lot of damn work into it and this is what pays their bills. I typically don’t like to pay for content myself, but I do pay for an ESPN Insider subscription. It’s worth it for Law’s work alone.

The Blue Jays will . . . not be blue some days next year

blue jays logo
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The Toronto Blue Jays, like a lot of teams, will wear an alternate jersey next year. It’ll be for Sunday home games. They call it their “Canadiana,” uniforms. Which, hey, let’s hear it for national pride.

(question to Canada: my grandmother and my three of my four maternal great-grandparents were Canadian. Does that give me any rights to emigrate? You know, just in case? No reason for asking that today. Just curious!).

Anyway, these are the uniforms:

More like RED Jays, am I right?

OK, I am not going to leave this country. I’m going to stay here and fight for what’s right: a Major League Baseball-wide ban on all red alternate jerseys for anyone except the Cincinnati Reds, who make theirs work somehow. All of the rest of them look terrible.

Oh, Canada indeed.