A Tony La Russa roast? I LOVE it

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The St. Louis chapter of the BBWAA is having its annual dinner on January 16th. And in addition to the usual awards and things, they’re shaking things up by roasting Tony La Russa:

To mark manager Tony La Russa’s return for a 16th season in the Cardinals dugout, the writers have invited some of his close friends and formers players to join the dinner in a … ahem … toast to the club’s winningest skipper. If some of those friends and players also choose to needle, jab, joke or otherwise tease TLR, well we can’t be held responsible. They’re men, not machines.

If there’s anyone in baseball who needs a good roasting it’s Tony La Russa. I have no idea how he’d take some truly inspired put-downs. I could see him laughing at himself. I could see him scowling. I could also see him pretending to enjoy the night while secretly making an enemies list that includes the participants.

But I do know this: the first guy up should start telling a joke, stop in the middle, be replaced by a guy who tells some more of it, stop, and then be replaced by a third guy who closes the joke out.

Masahiro Tanaka throws a Maddux

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You do know what a Maddux is, right? In case you forgot, it’s a complete game shutout in which the starter throws fewer than 100 pitches. Friend of HBT Jason Lukehart invented that little metric and, because Greg Maddux is my favorite player ever, it’s pretty much my favorite stat ever.

In the Yankees-Red Sox game tonight it was Masahiro Tanaka doing the honors, tossing 97-pitch three-hitter in which he only allowed one runner to reach second base to beat Boston 3-0. He only struck out three but he didn’t walk anyone. He retired the last 14 batters he faced.

Chris Sale was no slouch himself, striking out ten in eight innings. He’s pitched great this year but he’s not getting any help. The Sox have only scored four runs in his five starts. Boston has scored only 13 runs in their last seven games. They’ve been shut out three times in the past seven. They scored more runs than anyone last year, by the way.

The game only took two hours and twenty-one minutes. Or, like, half the time of a Yankees-Red Sox game in the early 2000s. Progress, people. We’re making progress.

Shelby Miller has a tear in his UCL, considering Tommy John surgery

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Nick Piecoro of the Arizona Republic reports that Diamondbacks pitcher Shelby Miller has a tear in his ulnar collateral ligament and is considering undergoing Tommy John surgery. Surgery would end Miller’s 2017 season and would cut into a significant portion — if not all — of his 2018 season as well.

Miller sent his MRI results to Dr. Neal ElAttrache and Dr. James Andrews for second and third opinions, respectively. He could choose to rehab his elbow rather than undergo surgery, but that comes with its own set of positives and negatives.

Miller lasted only four-plus innings in his most recent start on Sunday and carries a 4.09 ERA on the season, his second with the Diamondbacks. His time in Arizona has not gone well.