Cubs bullpen catcher found with eight pounds of pot

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Major league bullpen catchers might have the best job on the planet.   They make good money, get to watch every game from a prime location, travel in true first class on road trips, interact daily with incredibly talented pitchers, and they never actually have to play.  There’s even a little time to deal weed on the side.  Wait, what?

According to Gordon Wittenmyer of the Chicago Sun-Times, Cubs bullpen catcher Corey Miller was arrested Saturday after authorities in Nebraska discovered 8.4 pounds of marijuana in his vehicle during a traffic stop.  Miller, 34, was driving a pickup truck with his 26-year-old fiance Maria Myaskovsky and an infant.

Myaskovsky claimed sole responsibility for the large amount of pot and was arrested and charged with possession and intent to deliver.  She’s likely to see jail time.  Miller was released to take care of the infant and seems likely avoid further legal punishment, but it’s pretty much a sure thing that the Cubs will cut ties with him for good.  Bummer, dude.

Jose Fernandez’ memorial service will be today

JUPITER, FL - FEBRUARY 24: Pitcher Jose Fernandez of the Miami Marlins poses for photos on media day at Roger Dean Stadium on February 24, 2016 in Jupiter, Florida. (Photo by Marc Serota/Getty Images)
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There will be a public memorial service for Jose Fernandez today. The Miami Marlins said in a news release today that fans can gather along the west side of Marlins Park this afternoon for the departure of a funeral motorcade at 2:16 p.m. Fernandez wore No. 16 on his jersey. For those not in Miami, ESPN will provide live coverage of memorial services from 2-2:30 p.m. EDT.

A public viewing will be held at St. Brendan’s Catholic Church from 5 p.m. to 11 p.m. A private funeral Mass will be held tomorrow for family and Marlins players and personnel.

In lieu of flowers, the Fernandez family asks for charitable contributions to the JDF16 Foundation,

Video: Undercover David Ortiz drives a Lyft in Boston

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David Ortiz did one of those “Undercover Lyft” spots for, well, Lyft, in which famous people disguise themselves while driving passengers around. Yes, they’re ads, but they’re still pretty funny. At least this one was.

Best parts: (1) the woman who says she has two David Ortiz shirts to which Undercover Ortiz responds, “actually, all my shirts are his shirts”; and (2) when Ortiz agrees with someone that baseball games are “so loooong.” Oh, and at one point he tells a woman who said she was going to the Red Sox game that night that he was too. After he unmasked himself, she explains his own joke to him. Which, ooohhkay.

In other news, people who take Lyfts in Boston either don’t watch much baseball, because Ortiz’s costume is NOT very concealing, or else they simply don’t look at their Lyft driver while in the car, at all.