Don’t blow it again, Pirates: say no to Van Slyke! Hire Barry Bonds for the manager job!
Andy Van Slyke, in town with fellow alumnus Dave Parker for a
season-ticket holder event, took the opportunity to inform president
Frank Coonelly about his interest in the club’s managerial opening.
Van Slyke acknowledges that he may not be an ideal candidate, what with no managerial experience on any level. But that doesn’t matter, because his philosophy is sound:
“I think it would be absolutely arrogant for any manager to come in
here and think he’s going to be the difference. [As if] by his mere
presence, he could be the one to turn it around. I don’t care if Casey
Stengel stepped out of the grave and walked into spring training, any
manager would need a pitching staff with an ERA and numbers that [the
Pirates’ staff] didn’t have this year. Everything begins and ends with
pitching. Until that aspect improves dramatically … it’s an unfair
expectation for anyone to expect different results here.”
This is pretty brilliant when you think about it. Van Slyke is freely admitting that he has no experience and going one step further in saying that, if he were hired, the team should not expect positive results from anything he himself does.
He still may not get the job, but man, if he does, he’s gonna have some awesome job security.
We’re not talking the 100 meters here. We’re talking practical baseball sprinting. That’s defined by the StatCast folks at MLB as “feet per second in a player’s fastest one-second window,” while sprinting for the purposes of, you know, winning a baseball game.
StatCast ranked all players who have at least 10 “max effort” runs this year. I won’t give away who is at the top of this list, but given that baseball’s speedsters tend to get a lot of press you will not be at all surprised. As for the bottom of the list, well, the Angels don’t pay Albert Pujols to run even when he’s not suffering from late career chronic foot problems, so they’ll probably let that one go. I will say, however, that I am amused that the third slowest dude in baseball is named “Jett,” however.
Lately people have noticed some odd things about home run distances on StatCast, suggesting that maybe their metrics are wacko. And, of course, their means of gauging this stuff is proprietary and opaque, so we have no way of knowing if their numbers are off the reservation or not. As such, take all of the StatCast stuff you see with a grain of salt.
That said, even if the feet-per-second stuff is wrong here, knowing that Smith is faster than Jones by a factor of X is still interesting.
All-Star voting ends this Thursday night, just before midnight eastern time. The All-Star teams — at least how they’ll appear before the dozen or two substitutions we’ll get before the game — will be unveiled on Sunday at 7pm on ESPN, just before Sunday Night Baseball.
Which means you still have time to alter these standings, which now stand as the final update before things are set in, well, not stone, but at least some Play-Doh which has been left out of the can too long and is kinda hard to mess with.