Johan Santana's surgery "a success"

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The Mets have announced that Johan Santana had his shoulder surgery this morning and that “it was a success.”  Which is good to hear.

But of course we hear that all the time. I don’t wish ill on any specific player, but just once, on general principles, I would like to hear a team announce that a player’s surgery was “a total disaster.”

“Oh god, it was awful,” a team spokesman said. “They got in there and it was like spaghetti. The doctor tried — dear sweet lord, did he try! — but the surgery went sideways from the first slice and got worse from there. A nurse cried. I saw her crying.  Thank god we got the guy to sign a waiver before he went under. Will someone get me a drink?”

Phillies sign Trevor Plouffe to minor league deal

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Infielder Trevor Plouffe has signed a minor league deal with the Phillies, Gerry Fraley of the Dallas Morning News reports. Plouffe asked for and was granted his release from the Rangers earlier this month.

Plouffe, 31, had a double and a home run in 17 plate appearances with Triple-A Round Rock to start the 2018 season. He spent last year with the Athletics and Rays, putting up a meager .198/.272/.318 batting line in 100 games.

Plouffe has mostly played third base throughout his career, but can also handle the other three infield spots and both outfield corners, so he’ll serve as organizational depth at Triple-A Lehigh Valley for the Phillies.