I miss steroids. I also
miss amphetamines. Greenies. Speed. Uppers. Because you know what I really miss? I miss
upper-deck home runs. I miss lower-deck home runs. Look, at this
point I would settle for a two-hopper to the wall. Give me some
hits. Some runs. Let’s take baseball back a few years, to a time
when no-hitters were special and when All-Star Games didn’t knock
me out like two Ambiens and a sap to the skull.
— Gregg Doyel of CBS Sports.com, lamenting the lack of offense this season.
Of course almost exactly one year ago Doyel was writing about how steroids have “chipped away at the sports’ soul” over the course of one of the more ridiculously faux-outraged column I’ve seen since I started blogging about baseball. Seriously: read last year’s piece and then read today’s and tell me that the guy has ever had a coherent thought in his life.
Not that coherence is one of Doyel’s primary aims. His m.o. is to write ridiculous columns in an attempt to create some crazy, on-the-edge bad boy persona. Sometimes that requires thinking steroids are the worst thing ever. Sometimes it requires pretending they don’t matter a bit. It’s all about being edgy with him.
Personally, I prefer to read someone who actually has a serious point once in a while.
As it turns out, Derek Jeter isn’t the only former major leaguer interested in the Marlins. Bloomberg’s Scott Soshnick reports that Hall of Fame hurler Tom Glavine has entered the bidding process as part of a group that includes Tagg Romney and several carefully-selected investors. Soshnick adds that Tagg’s father, Mitt Romney, is not part of the bidding process for the Marlins, though Glavine and Romney’s relationship makes an interesting parallel with Derek Jeter and Jeb Bush’s potential partnership during the sale.
According to an unnamed source, current Marlins’ owner Jeffrey Loria is said be fielding offers ranging from $1.2 to $1.3 billion. (To put those figures in perspective, the initial purchase price for the team was $158 million in 2002.) Glavine recently spoke to the Boston Globe’s Nick Cafardo about the bidding process, and revealed that he had been involved in talks about a potential bid since last summer. He also expressed a willingness to step into a leadership role with the Marlins, should the opportunity arise:
I certainly want a role. I’m not going to say I’m the GM, but I know the game pretty well. I understand it. There’s a lot on the business side that I don’t understand, so I’m open-minded about what the best role for me would be and what I like to do the most.
On the one hand, I don’t want to be pompous enough to say I want to step in and run this thing, but at the same time I want to be looking for where I would be best served for the organization if it happens.
Glavine and Romney are currently thought to comprise one of three major parties bidding on the Marlins, including Jeter/Bush and Quogue Capital president Wayne P. Rothbaum.
The Athletics acquired outfielder Ryan LaMarre from the Angels for cash considerations or a player to be named later, per a team announcement on Sunday. In a corresponding move, they placed right-hander Chris Bassitt on the 60-day disabled list and assigned the outfielder to Triple-A Nashville.
LaMarre, 28, signed a one-year contract with the Angels in November, but was designated for assignment last Tuesday in order to clear roster space for veteran catcher Juan Graterol. He batted .268/.375/.341 with two extra base hits and four stolen bases through 10 games in Triple-A Salt Lake.
The outfielder has not seen a major league assignment since 2016, when he appeared in six games with the Red Sox (three times in the outfield and once on the mound) and went 0-for-5 with a walk. He’s expected to give the A’s some depth in the minors and will join Andrew Lambo, Matt McBride, Kenny Wilson and Jaycob Brugman in Nashville’s outfield.