Braves 5, Nationals 0: You can throw all the fire in the world, but if your defense isn’t any good, you’re not going to go very far. That’s a lesson Stephen Strasburg learned last night as the Nats’ defense did a Marx Brothers’ routine behind him in the seventh inning, allowing the Braves to score a zillion times. Wait, that’s not fair: the Marx Brothers were nothing if not competent. Hell, they were a well-oiled machine, really. The Nats were more like the Stooges. Like, post-Curly and Shemp-era Stooges. With Ian Desmond as Joe Besser.
Reds 7, Phillies 3: Johnny Cueto gave up only one run in eight innings despite not striking anyone out. Don’t see that every day. Scott Rolen hit his 300th career homer. Chase Utley left the game after jamming his thumb stretching a single into a double.
Cardinals 6, Diamondbacks 5: The Cards keep pace thanks to the latest in a series of late game catastrophes for Arizona this year. This one was less a bullpen problem than a defense problem, as two key throwing errors allowed multiple Cardinals runs to score. Of course one of the throwing errors was on reliever Aaron Heilman, so maybe you do count it as a bullpen problem. And interesting ettickal question.
Marlins 10, Mets 3: R.A. Dickey reverts to old form in Puerto Rico (5 IP, 5 H, 5 ER) and the Mets pen doesn’t do much better. A three run homer for Mike Stanton tops off Edwin Rodriguez’s homecoming game in style. Though I’m happy for him that he got to manage in his homeland, I’d still like to know what happened with that Bobby V. thing. Unless someone tells me otherwise I’m going to assume that he had, like, three bartenders quit on him at his sports bar in Stamford and now he has to hustle back and forth between pulling extra shifts there and his night job on Baseball Tonight up in Bristol.
Pirates 2, Cubs 1: The Buccos win their first road game in 18 tries behind eight innings of one-run ball from Paul Maholm. An RBI double from Jose Tabata in the ninth inning was der differencemacher.
Tigers 7, Twins 5: The Tigers take possession of first place in the AL Central, but Joel Zumaya left the game with an obviously painful arm injury after throwing a pitch in the eighth. All of that pales, however, compared to the fact that Jim Thome hit a triple. The last time he had a triple that didn’t have the words “decker cheeseburger” after it was in 2004.
Indians 2, Blue Jays 1: No one comes around and tells me that I disrespect the Blue Jays anymore. That’s kind of sad, really. Not as sad as getting held to one run by the Indians’ staff, but pretty sad all the same.
Royals 3, White Sox 1: The Chisox loaded the bases with nobody out in the ninth but couldn’t plate a single run and were retired on a strikeout and a couple of infield popups. Anthony Larew got his first major league win. Which seems wacky to me because, as is the case with a lot of guys who came up with the Braves, I feel like Larew has been around forever. I bet fans of every team have a few guys like this.
Astros 9, Brewers 5: The Astros fell into a 4-0 deficit in the early
going but roared back. Michael Bourn had a good game: four hits,
including a solo home run in the third and an RBI
single in the sixth. He also struck out once after stepping out of the
box while asking for a time out that was never granted. That’s always
Dodgers 4, Giants 2: The Giants hit into five double plays.
One of them came off the bat of Edgar Renteria in the fifth. Renteria
was first-pitch swinging with Pablo Sandoval on first base after he
walked on four straight pitches. Repeat: Pablo “I’ll swing at anything
south of the bridge and north of the airport” Sandoval walked on four
straight pitches, and Renteria thought it wise to immediate hack at the
first pitch right afterward. Mercy.
Rockies 10, Padres 6: Ubaldo Jiminez hadn’t allowed a hit into the
sixth inning. The wheels fell off for him then, however, allowing three
singles a homer, a walk and four runs. Lucky for him he had an 8-0 lead
at the time.