Denard Span: "you can't make that call right there"

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I like Denard Span. Fun guy to watch. Seems like a thoughtful fellow too.  But his comments after getting picked off at second base in yesterday’s game aren’t an example of Span at his best:

“I had told the second-base umpire, I let him know how I felt the
inning after I ran to my position. I just felt like there was no point
in arguing, because he’s already called me out. We had an early game, so
I know everybody’s trying to get out of here. We’ve got a storm coming
in, that’s what I heard.

“You can’t make that call right there. We were battling. Usually
pickoff plays like that, it has to be blatant–like I’m one thousand
percent out.”

This is why I could never do play-by-play or color work for ballgames. If I did, there is a 1000% chance that I would ascribe some percentage of outness to Denard Span every single time he didn’t reach base safely, most likely beating it to death as the season wore on.

And if I were one of his teammates, I would, without question, be at the mall this morning having “1000% out” t-shirts made for everyone in the clubhouse.

The Braves will be serving some insane food this season

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Lots of teams have crazy concession items and lots of them will circulate photos of the more gonzo ones in the coming week leading up to the baseball season. The Braves, however, have been one of the more aggressive players in the gimmick concession item game in recent years, and they just sent around a release talking about some of the stuff they, and their concessionaire, Delaware North, will be serving at their new ballpark, Sun Trust Park, in 2017.

Among them:a blackened catfish po boy, which is a blackened 6-ounce filet of catfish cut up among three tacos, with a cajun remoulade. Some BBQ beef brisket sliders. A double burger. An ice cream bar. They’re also going to have a regionally-inspired thing called “The Taste of Braves Country,” showcasing southern cooking from Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Tennessee, Mississippi and Alabama. Which they’re calling “Braves Country.” Accurate enough, I guess, even if some of us are old enough to remember when they aspired to be a national team. Alas.

The big item, though, is this one:

It’s called the “Tomahawk Chop” sandwich. It’s a fried pork chop with collard green slaw and white BBQ sauce. It serves four and costs $26. I’m guessing it tastes fantastic, but I think the name is pretty cringeworthy for the same reason the cheer which gives it its name is. And, given the dynamics of the Braves move to their new stadium, the choice of BBQ sauce is . . . amusing? I dunno.

Anyway, enjoy, Braves fans.

Max Scherzer will not be ready for Opening Day

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Ten days ago Nationals ace Max Scherzer said he’d be ready for the start of the regular season. “I’m gonna do it,” Scherzer said.

[Ron Howard from “Arrested Development” voice] — No, he’s not:

Nationals manager Dusty Baker said that Max Scherzer is not on track to be the team’s opening day starter, and will most likely open the season as the third pitcher in the rotation.

He’s still projected to make it to the opening rotation, taking the hill, most likely, on Thursday April 6 against the Marlins. At least if the schedule doesn’t slip any more.

Scherzer, as you probably know, has a stress fracture in the knuckle of his right ring finger, which has messed with his preparation and has caused him to alter his grip a bit. As of now Stephen Strasburg will get the Opening Day nod.