Bad idea jeans: The Marlins are handing out vuvuzelas tomorrow

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I’m not following the World Cup closely enough to be able to say anything all that insightful. I know that England gave us that goal we got in the first game. I know we got boned this morning in the Slovenia game. I know that everyone hates the vuvuzelas too.

In fact, these plastic horns are so hated that some baseball teams — most notably the Yankees — have issued a peremptory ban on fans bringing them into the ballpark. The ban is less to prevent the actual annoyance than because there is a non-trivial chance that anyone who blows one of those things at the ballpark will be murdered, and that’s a lot of paperwork the Yankees don’t need.

But never fear, fans of obnoxiously awful things, the Marlins got your back!

Like it or not, Marlins players – and fans – will get an earful of
World Cup soccer atmosphere Saturday night at Sun Life Stadium. Plastic
horns will be given to the first 15,000 fans as part of a promotion to
capitalize on the World Cup buzz.

I’m not sure what’s funnier: that the Marlins think anyone would want to sit and listen to that awful buzz or that there will be 15,000 people at the ballpark on Saturday to get one.

Video: This is an interesting way to avoid getting tagged out

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - AUGUST 20:  Yoenis Cespedes #52 of the New York Mets is congratulated by teammates after he hit a solo home run against the San Francisco Giants in the top of the third inning at AT&T Park on August 20, 2016 in San Francisco, California.  (Photo by Thearon W. Henderson/Getty Images)
Thearon W. Henderson/Getty Images
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The Mets rode a bloop hit and a fortuitous slide by Yoenis Cespedes into a four-run fifth inning against the Cardinals during Thursday night’s game.

After Cespedes drew a one-out walk, James Loney hit a weak pop-up into shallow left field. Left fielder Brandon Moss and shortstop Greg Garcia both gave chase but it dropped in. Cespedes, running the bases aggressively, sprinted towards third base. Moss scooped up the ball and threw to Adam Wainwright covering third base.

Cespedes appeared to have been tagged out by Wainwright, but as luck would have it, Cespedes’ cleats stuck on Wainwright’s glove and yanked it off. Cespedes was ruled safe and the Cardinals challenged the call, but it was ultimately upheld.

After that play, Curtis Granderson struck out, Wilmer Flores reached on a fielding error by Garcia, and Alejandro De Aza hit a three-run home run to right field, pushing the Mets’ lead to 7-0.

Video: Jason Kipnis jokes around after Rougned Odor slides hard into second base

DETROIT, MI - JUNE 24:  Jason Kipnis #22 of the Cleveland Indians takes to the field for the ninth inning of a game against the Detroit Tigers at Comerica Park on June 24, 2016 in Detroit, Michigan. Kipnis hit two triples and drove in three runs in a 7-4 win over the Tigers. (Photo by Duane Burleson/Getty Images)
Duane Burleson/Getty Images
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You may recall that, back in May, Rangers second baseman Rougned Odor got into a fight with Blue Jays outfielder Jose Bautista. Bautista slid late into second base, with which Odor took issue, so he punched Bautista in the face. That earned him a seven-game suspension.

With one out in the fifth inning of Thursday’s game against the Indians, Odor reached on a fielding error by first baseman Mike Napoli. Jonathan Lucroy then hit into an inning-ending 6-4-3 double play. Odor slid hard into Jason Kipnis covering second base.

Kipnis, hearkening back to the Bautista fight, backed up as if he were afraid Odor would punch him. Odor got a good chuckle out of it, but it was the Rangers’ bench which perhaps enjoyed the joke most. The Rangers’ broadcast showing Adrian Beltre cracking up and telling his other teammates what had happened.