PETA would prefer the Marlins use robot fish

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Last week we found out that the Florida Marlins are planning to put real fish in real salt water aquariums in the wall behind home plate at their new ballpark.

This week we find out the predictable reaction: PETA is protesting the proposal. The organization sent a letter to Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria denouncing the idea, according to the Miami Herald.

“Being exposed to the loud crowds, bright lights, and reverberations of a baseball stadium would be stressful and maddening for any large animals held captive in tanks that, to them, are like bathtubs,” wrote PETA executive vice president Tracy Reiman in the letter to Loria.

The Marlins, who unveiled the aquarium plans last week, said the see-through tanks would be constructed with the same material used in bullet-proof glass to ensure fish safety.

Marlins president David Samson told the Herald that he had not seen the letter, but said the fish would be “treated as well, or better, than any fish can be,” and didn’t sound willing to budge on the issue.

“I guess that’s a philosophical issue,” Samson said. “But there are beautiful aquariums all over the world and this will be one of them.”

But give PETA some credit, for Instead of simply protesting the use of fish at the ballpark, the organization actually offered up some palatable (to them) alternatives, including the use of “robotic fish that can ‘swim’ through water.”

Intrigued by the idea of robot fish, I did a little research (i.e. Google) and discovered that the Japanese have already invented a robot carp. Eureka!

Why a robot carp, you ask? I’m not sure, but I believe the Japanese will make a robot version of pretty much anything. They just like robots that much, and if they want to create this or this or this, who are we to discourage them?

Besides, they have done us a huge favor by solving this budding controversy over the Marlins’ ballpark aquarium. All the team has to do is shell out about $250,000 for each robot carp. No problem right?

 

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Derek Jeter-Jeb Bush reportedly in agreement to purchase the Marlins

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UPDATE: In the wake of the earlier reports now come multiple reports that, yes, Derek Jeter and Jeb Bush are in agreement to purchase the Miami Marlins. No one in the know is commenting officially, however.

A purchase price is not yet known, though it is expected to be, at a minimum, $1.4 billion, which was the sale price of the Mariners last year. Reports are that Jeter and Bush are still seeking funding sources, but that rival groups have dropped out and that Jeff Loria and the Jeter-Bush team have a handshake agreement.

There are, as we have seen in recent years, a few hurdles to get over, primarily the finalization of funding. But at the moment it appears as if Derek Jeter and Jeb Bush are going to be the next owners of the Miami Marlins.

2:44 PM: There are a couple of confusing and potentially conflicting reports swirling about the Miami Marlins sale right now.

When last we heard, there were two high-profile groups with reported interest. One run by Hall of Famer Derek Jeter and politician Jeb Bush. The other run by Hall of Famer Tom Glavine and . . . son of politician, Tagg Romney.

Today Scott Soshnick of Bloomberg reported that the Jeter-Bush group has “won the auction” for the team. Mike Ozanian of Forbes reported earlier in the day, however, that they haven’t “won” anything. They merely remain the last group standing and that they have submitted a “non-binding indication of interest,” which, as the name suggests, means very little formally. They’re still seeking funding sources. Ozanian reports that the Glavine-Romney team is out.

That’s all a bit confusing, but given how team sales tend to go — slowly, with pretty established and plugged-in sports business types deliberately reporting the progress of negotiations — Ozanian’s report feels a bit more credible. Either way, I’d say it’s way, way too early to photoshop a Marlins cap on old pictures of Derek Jeter just yet.

UPDATE: Then there’s this:

Which does make it sound more official, but leaves open the question of whether Jeter and Bush have the money together.

The first native Lithuanian in MLB history made his debut last night

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Why yes, it is a slow news day. But let’s not allow that to take away from some MLB history.

Last night a young man named Dovydas Neverauskas pitched in mopup duty for the Pirates, who were getting hammered by the Cubs. Mr. Neverauskas pitched two innings, allowing one run, making him, by default, the most effective pitcher the Pirates sent out there last night.

That’s good, but that’s not what makes it historic. What makes it historic is that Neverauskas is the first person born and raised in Lithuania to make the Majors. Here’s some back story on him from last year’s Futures Game.

Lithuania is known for producing basketball players. Now it has its first major leaguer. Whether he becomes baseball’s Arvydas Sabonis is an open question.