Satire: Joe Morgan's very special advice to the Reds

Leave a comment

It took a few hours of digging, but HardballTalk has uncovered Joe Morgan’s first memo to GM Walt Jocketty issued under his new title as Special Adviser to Baseball Operations.
Apparently typed by the same person who used to handle his ESPN chats, it reads as follows:

Dearest Walter,
While our 2010 Reds are undoubtedly a fine team, I can’t help but remember how the 1975 Reds were 13-1 after 14 games. We have the game’s greatest manager in Dusty, so it’s time for you to go get us some players.
1. Trade Chris Dickerson to Mets for Gary Matthews Jr.
Matthews is a great defensive outfielder and he gets things done. Some guys seem to focus better when the game’s on the line. Dickerson just strikes out a lot.
2. Trade Drew Stubbs to Mariners for Ken Griffey Jr.
Griffey’s old man hit .330 with 25 homers for the 1975 Reds. The Kid’s still got it. Stats don’t tell you about heart, determination and mental attitude.
3. Trade Homer Bailey to the Rangers for Julio Borbon
No pitcher with the name Homer is ever going to be a winner. Why I remember when we went and picked up a pitcher named Woodie Fryman and we never won another World Series. Don’t downplay intangibles. Derek Jeter is the best example that you can get of a guy that helps you win championships with his intangibles. Now, Julio isn’t actually related to our old ace reliever Pedro Borbon, who had 45 saves for the 1975 Reds, but we don’t have to tell anyone that.
4. Trade for Alex Concepcion and Concepcion Rodriguez
I just asked Mark Simon and he told me there were two Concepcions playing in the minors right now. We need them both. Doesn’t matter who you have to give up, Walt. Follow my plan and we’re not going to have use for that Bruce fella anymore anyway.
You go ahead and get started on these and then we’ll see about getting some pitchers. I know you’re pretty much hopeless there after you missed out on Livan over the winter, but I have my eye on a few guys. I’m told Tommy Hanson will be starting on Sunday night, and he reminds me of a young Gary Nolan. I’ll do you a solid and talk him down a bit.
Regards,
Joe Morgan
Hall of Famer
2 World Championships
2 MVPs
5 Gold Gloves
P.S. Russ Ortiz is available. Not every day you can acquire a 20-game winner.
P.P.S. I’d just like to congratulate my daughter for winning her gymnastics competition last weekend.
P.P.P.S. None of this is real, if that wasn’t abundantly clear already.

Must-Click Link: The Turbulent Final Year of Yordano Ventura’s Life

KANSAS CITY, MO - OCTOBER 23:  Yordano Ventura #30 of the Kansas City Royals reacts in the sixth inning while taking on the Toronto Blue Jays in game six of the 2015 MLB American League Championship Series at Kauffman Stadium on October 23, 2015 in Kansas City, Missouri.  (Photo by Jamie Squire/Getty Images)
5 Comments

The Kansas City Star has covered the death of Yordano Ventura and its aftermath in a thorough, thoughtful, respectful and admirable fashion and it has all been compelling to read, even if it’s often been difficult to read. Their latest story may be the most difficult, though it is nonetheless essential.

It covers the final year of Ventura’s life which, sadly, was tumultuous. He had become estranged from his family. He was married to a woman who, at the time of the ceremony, was still married to her first husband and whose family, allegedly, later made threats against Ventura that we’re only now learning about. This includes allegations of armed men accosting Ventura at his home near the Royals spring training facility a year ago. An incident which led to him missing time due to “flulike symptoms,” but which, in reality, caused him considerable mental distress. He was again threatened, it is claimed, in Kansas City during the season. There is also an allegation that Ventura attempted suicide via an overdose of Benadryl, though that is disputed.

Beyond that, there is an arc to the end of Ventura’s life which sounds unfortunately familiar. It’s a story of a young man whose life changed dramatically in a very, very short period of time and who struggled at times to process the changes. Were it not for a fateful drive on a dark and winding road one night in late January, they all could’ve been things that, as his career matured, he could look back on as learning experiences. Now that he’s gone, however, they form the final, tragic chapter.

Report: Royals and Eric Hosmer have discussed a long-term contract extension

SAN DIEGO, CA - JULY 12:  Eric Hosmer #35 of the Kansas City Royals and the American League rounds the bases after hitting a home run against the National League in the 2nd inning of the 87th Annual MLB All-Star Game at PETCO Park on July 12, 2016 in San Diego, California.  (Photo by Denis Poroy/Getty Images)
Denis Poroy/Getty Images
15 Comments

Ken Rosenthal of FOX Sports reports that the Royals and first baseman Eric Hosmer have discussed a long-term contract extension. However, Hosmer also indicated that he will head into free agency if a deal is not consummated by Opening Day.

Hosmer, 27, avoided arbitration with the Royals last month, agreeing to a $12.25 million salary for the 2017 season. He is one of four key Royals players who can become a free agent after the season along with Mike Moustakas, Alcides Escobar, and Lorenzo Cain. If Hosmer does reach free agency, he would arguably be the top free agent first baseman.

Hosmer finished the past season hitting .266/.328/.433 with 25 home runs and 104 RBI while making his first All-Star team.