It has been established that ballparks which have recently died have been
returning to life and committing acts of baseball murder. A widespread
investigation of funeral homes, morgues, and domes has concluded
that the unburied dead have been returning to life and seeking baseball
victims. It’s hard for us here to be reporting this to you, but it does
seem to be a fact:
Due to sub-freezing temperatures and snow in the forecast this weekend, the
Kansas baseball team will open the 2010 season on Monday, Feb. 22
against Eastern Michigan with a doubleheader at the Metrodome in
Minneapolis, Minn. at 5 p.m.
Query: how bad would the weather need to be in a hypothetical Twins playoff series before they broke out the Metrodome contingency plan? Given the revenues the new joint stands to draw — hot chocolate will probably cost $9 a cup — I have to imagine that the threshhold would be really, really high, but you have to assume that the scenario has entered into someone’s mind.
My view: nuke it from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.
The Brewers offloaded outfielder Michael Choice’s contract to the Nexen Heroes of the Korea Baseball Organization, per a team announcement on Friday. Choice signed a minor league deal with the Brewers in early May, but did not earn a major league stint in 11 weeks with the team.
It’s been two full years since the 27-year-old outfielder snagged a big league opportunity of any kind. He last appeared with the Rangers in 2015 and played in just one game, striking out in his only at-bat. His production rate sagged through three consecutive minor league assignments with the Indians, Orioles and Brewers and peaked in 2016 after slashing .246/.304/.456 with 14 home runs for the Indians’ Triple-A Columbus. He was off to a decent start this season for the Brewers’ Double-A Biloxi, working a .272/.349/.503 batting line with nine home runs and an .852 OPS through his first 195 PA.
Choice is poised to join several other ex-major leaguers on the Heroes’ roster, including left-hander Andy Van Hekken, right-hander Jake Brigham and infielder/outfielder Danny Dorn.
6:43 PM: Danny Dorn no longer plays for the Nexen Heroes, as he was released to clear roster space for Choice.
Our old friend Joe Posnanski tackles a venerable topic over at MLB.com: guys you totally forgot played for a given team. Mostly superstars who had brief stops at non-signature stations at the end of their careers. Or guys, like Mike Piazza and Reggie Jackson, who were with a team for a blink of an eye in between more famous way stations.
We’ve all had this conversation before: remember Willie Mays with the Mets? Doc Gooden with the Astros? John Smoltz with the Cardinals? Heck, I had forgotten about Smoltz with the Cardinals and he was a star on my favorite team once upon a time.
Posnanski calls them “Irony Jerseys.” That’s pretty appropriate, as one can totally imagine someone buying, say, that Dale Murphy Rockies jersey in the name of obscurity. Whatever you call it, it’s a good read.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to get my Ted Simmons Braves jersey for a party at some place uptown that you’ve probably never heard of.