Yep, it's Sharlee Jeter getting married

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I know you don’t care about this, but (a) there are a couple dozen substantive posts a day here so I’m entitled to a little fluff time and again; and (b) since it validates my source, I’m gonna post it anyway.

Derek Jeter is not getting married, and yes — as you heard EXCLUSIVELY from CTB, it is in fact Derek’s sister, Sharlee Jeter getting married in November [note: link launches to dumb talk radio show; don’t say I didn’t warn you].

Apparently she’s marrying some rapper named Skyzoo. According to his Wikipedia page, “He cites as influences hip hop artists such as Notorious B.I.G., Jay-Z, Nas, N.W.A., Big Daddy Kane, and Kid ‘n Play, as well as artists such as Sade, Nirvana and John Coltrane, and cites Coltrane’s A Love Supreme as his favorite album.” Based on that list I think we can safely say that the Jeter family is getting a quality addition.

Not that, um, I’m a big, big Sade fan or anything. Anymore. Much. [hangs head in shame . . .you’re my sweetest taboo, Sade. You’re my sweetest taboo].

 

Red Sox Triple-A team to ban people named Tyler and Austin from stadium on May 5 and 6 as part of promotion

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The Pawtucket Red Sox, obviously the Triple-A affiliate of the Red Sox, have come up with an interesting promotion for the weekend of May 5 and 6, when they host the Yankees’ Triple-A team from Scranton/Wilkes-Barre.

This, of course, references last week’s benches-clearing fracas between the Red Sox and Yankees that involved Joe Kelly and Tyler Austin. Kelly slid hard into second base, which upset Brock Holt. The benches emptied as the two jawed at each other, but no punches were thrown. Later in the game, Kelly threw at Austin and the benches emptied again. Punches were thrown this time and both players were given suspensions.

The major league Red Sox visit the Yankees May 8-10. As far as we’re aware, people named Joe or Kelly are allowed to attend.