Biggest postseason shocker: Waterfall swimmer not drunk, just stupid

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David Brown of Yahoo! Sports put together all the amusing screen captures of the doofus Angels fan who went swimming in the outfield waterfall last night.
Security took their sweet time chasing after him, so the guy was basically able to go through an entire routine of jumps and dives, finishing each move with that same hands-in-the-air pose Olympic gymnasts have when they successfully land on the mat.
You’d assume that someone willing to go swimming in a waterfall built on rocks in the outfield of a ballpark would have been motivated by the copious amounts of booze running through them, but amazingly police said afterward that 29-year-old Jose Cervera wasn’t even drunk.
Of course, isn’t it actually worse if you’re acting like that and you’re not even drunk? If he wasn’t drunk then he’s just an idiot. But then again I guess we knew that already. Anyway, Cervera initially seemed like bad luck when the Angels coughed up a 4-0 lead soon after his performance, but then they stormed back to win 7-6.
Sure, he was probably in a holding cell by the time Brian Fuentes wriggled out of the ninth-inning jam, but there’s no need to get technical about good-luck charms. I’m really hoping this guy becomes the new Rally Monkey.

Steven Souza diagnosed with a strained pectoral muscle

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Steven Souza looked like he sustained a major shoulder injury after diving for a ball and missing on Wednesday night. Turns out, though, that it is not nearly as bad as it could’ve been: he has a strained pectoral muscle. That’ll only keep him out “a couple of weeks” according to Dbacks manager Torey Lovullo.

Good news for Souza and the Diamondbacks, who are counting on their new right fielder’s power to help offset the loss of J.D. Martinez, who helped the Dbacks to the playoffs with his second half home run outburst. He hit 30 with Tampa Bay last year and would seem poised to at least match that given Chase Field’s more hitter-friendly reputation.

Until Souza returns Jarrod Dyson and Yasmany Tomas will likely cover right field.