CSI: Buster Olney

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Miguel Cabrera has apologized to his teammates and the Tigers have been eliminated, so the whole issue of him getting his drink on and getting violent is now less a public matter than it is a matter between Cabrera, his wife, his team, his health and the law, but I’d be remiss in not pointing out Buster Olney’s piece on it all today.  He contacted an expert to determine whether or not Cabrera was still drunk at gametime last Saturday. The upshot:

Jim Fell, the Director for Traffic Safety and Enforcement Programs of the Pacific Institute for Research and Evaluation, in Calverton, Md., said in a phone interview that the typical person processes alcohol at the rate of about .015 per hour, which means that someone with a blood alcohol level of .26 would need about 17 hours for the alcohol to clear his or her system. An experienced drinker would metabolize alcohol at about .020 per hour . . . an experienced drinker would have required 13 hours to metabolize alcohol at that level.

Based on the time of the BAC test and first pitch, that means that if Cabrera metabolizes booze like an experienced drinker, he was at a .08 at the time he showed up at the ballpark and a .02 at first pitch.  If he’s more of a regular Joe, he would have been a .08 at game time. Of course, Olney’s expert did not factor in the healing power of Sausage McMuffins in all of this, so I’m a bit dubious of the results. 

That aside, I’m inclined to think Cabrera would be better off if he metabolized like a normal person. A BAC of 08 is probably buzzed. With a .02, you’re likely entering full-blown hangover mode.  Your mileage may vary, but while being sober is always preferable, drinkers I know — and Cabrera sounds like one — tend to function a tad better with a little grease in the gears than they do when the gears are grinding following a bender.

Anyone who wants to take their last shots at Cabrera had better do so in the comments, because I’m not writing about him again until the inevitable “Cabrera enters rehab” story comes out.

Major League Baseball reveals their special event uniforms for 2018


Major League Baseball will once again celebrate various holidays and special occasions with special uniforms this season. The special caps and unis for Memorial Day and the Fourth of July are largely in keeping with past practice. There’s a fairly notable change for Mother’s and Father’s Day, however, as what were once pink and blue accents are now full-blown pink and blue caps.

On Jackie Robinson Day — April 15 — players will, as always, be wearing number 42. New this year will be patches on the jerseys and caps. Like so:

Here is what the Mother’s Day caps will look like:

And for Dad:

Here’s Memorial Day. Like last year, the stars represent the five branches of the U.S. military. There will be camo jerseys, like you’ve seen before, to match:


The Blue Jays’ caps will feature four clusters for the four branches of the Canadian military:

Here’s the Fourth of July which will, again, be paired with stars and stripes-themed jerseys:

And check out the inside of the bill:


Fun fact: the Fourth of July is the day the signing of the Declaration of Independence was signed. It has little if anything to do with the Constitution, from which “We The People” is taken, which was ratified on June 21, 1788. But don’t stop MLB, they’re on a roll.

The Blue Jays cap, again, differs, with the logo being a gold maple leaf and the inside of the bill simply saying “Canada”:

As always, proceeds from the sale of this merch will go to the Jackie Robinson Foundation, Susan G. Komen, the Prostate Cancer Foundation and Stand Up To Cancer.

As as also long been the case, Major League Baseball will do nothing for Labor Day, much to my annual annoyance.