How not to steal a baseball monument

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ripken_monument_090909.jpgFour men have been arrested on charges of felony theft and destruction of property, accused of removing a four-foot aluminum monument to Cal Ripken from outside Camden Yards on Wednesday.

It took police all of two hours to track them down, thanks to a number of mistakes they made along the way

— They bit off more than they could chew. They took Cal Ripken’s No. 8. There were a number of others to be had nearby, including Brooks Robinson’s No. 5, Jim Palmer’s No. 22 and Eddie Murray’s No. 33. Yet they chose Ripken. You think the police put out an “all-points bulletin” for Eddie Murray? I don’t think so.

— No disguise. The men were caught on surveillance cameras. If you’re going to break the law, wear a mask. Even Phoenix flight attendants know that.

— No discipline. The officers spotted the giant No. 8 in the back of a pickup truck when they responded to a disorderly conduct report. Mr. Blonde, Mr. Pink, Mr. White and Nice Guy Eddie, is that you?

— No money for legal counsel.

There was no indication they had attorneys.

Come on people. Do I have to do everything?

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If you Twitter, and find a life of crime to be incredibly exhausting, follow me at @Bharks.

Report: Brewers sign Yovani Gallardo to a major league deal

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Free agent right-hander Yovani Gallardo is headed back to the Brewers on a major league deal, The Athletic’s Ken Rosenthal reports. No other terms have been reported yet, as the agreement is still pending a physical.

Gallardo, 31, completed a one-year run with the Mariners before getting his $13 million option declined by the team last month. He provided little value during his time in Seattle, pitching to a 5-10 record in 22 starts and putting up a 5.72 ERA, 4.1 BB/9 and 6.5 SO/9 in 130 2/3 innings as both a starter and reliever.

Still, assuming the veteran righty is on the cusp of a comeback, he may as well try for it with his original club. Gallardo last appeared for the Brewers from 2007 to 2014, racking up a cumulative 20.8 fWAR and peaking during the 2010 season, when he earned his first All-Star nomination and Silver Slugger award. This will be his ninth career season with the club.

Even with Gallardo aboard, the Brewers are expected to continue deepening their pitching stores for 2018. With team ace Jimmy Nelson still recovering from shoulder surgery, the club will enter the season with a projected rotation of Gallardo, Zach Davies, Chase Anderson and Junior Guerra, the latter of whom pitched just 70 1/3 innings in 2017 following a right calf strain and shin contusion. Another big name pitcher could help cement Milwaukee’s rotation and keep them competitive for another year, though they don’t appear to have made any concrete moves in that direction so far.