Quick hits from Wednesday night

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I didn’t get a chance to post my usual “And That Happened” recaps this
morning, but here are some quick hits regarding last night’s games:

Andruw Jones went crazy against the Angels last night, hitting three homers.
Which is the same number of homers he hit all last year. And which, for
the season, puts him at .250/.348/.581. That sound you hear is me
banging my head against the wall in the realization that he, and not
Jeff Francoeur, could have very easily been manning right field in
Atlanta this year. Rangers are in first, now, kids. They’re for real,
and my pre-season prediction that had them winning the west still looks
prescient. Sure, it was a wild-ass guess, but that’s what we call
prescience before the fact.

Oliver Perez is back, and better than ever! Oh, wait, He walked seven guys. Dodgers: how do you lose a game to Oliver Perez when he walks seven guys?

Chris Volstad and Wandy Rodriguez
each pitched five-hit shutouts. It is such a bizarre coincidence that
anything so mind boggglingly improbable could have happened purely by
chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as the final and
clinching proof of the non-existence of God.

Jose Contreras apparently spent his rehab time earlier this season working with Ponce de Leon.
And in this crazy, mixed-up world, isn’t it refreshing that you can
still count on some things in life? Thing like the Indians sucking?

Prince Fielder legged out an infield single
that drove in the go-ahead run and which caused the U.S. Geological
Survey and several local fire departments to go on high alert. See,
because he’s a big guy and there was a lot of thigh-friction and . . .
ah, well, never mind.

The Tigers finally figured out how to beat Zack Greinke. Leyland:
“When you are going against a guy like Greinke, you know that you are
going to have to get a great game from your starter. If you give up
three or four runs, he’s going to beat you, so I was very happy with
what French did tonight.” Thank goodness for the Tigers that Greinke
still pitches for the Royals, so three or four runs aren’t all that
distinct a possibility.

You always want to win games, but I bet the Reds are just as happy to finally see an effective Homer Bailey (6 IP, 7 H, 2 ER, 6K 0 BB) as they would have been to see a victory.

Four baseballs autographed by Jose Fernandez wash ashore

MIAMI, FL - AUGUST 03: Jose Fernandez #16 of the Miami Marlins looks on during a game against the New York Mets at Marlins Park on August 3, 2015 in Miami, Florida.  (Photo by Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images)
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This is just . . . ugh.

WSVN-TV in Miami reports that a black bag containing Jose Fernandez’s checkbook and four baseballs signed by him washed ashore on Miami Beach. Probably a bag to keep stuff dry while out on the water.

The bag was given to a lifeguard. Hopefully the bag finds its way back to Fernandez’s family quickly.

Marlins sign Martin Prado to a three-year extension

ATLANTA, GA - AUGUST 06:  Martin Prado #14 of the Miami Marlins hits a sacrifice fly in the third inning during the game against the Atlanta Braves at Turner Field on August 6, 2015 in Atlanta, Georgia.  (Photo by Mike Zarrilli/Getty Images)
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The Miami Herald reports that the Marlins and Martin Prado have agreed to a three-year, $40 million contracy extension.

Prado has been highly effective for Miami, hitting .297/.350/.405 over two seasons The Marlins were eager to keep him and many teams were no doubt interested in trying to sign him this winter as he stood pretty darn tall on a pretty weak free agent market. He may very well have done better than the $40 million he’s getting, but a qualifying offer could’ve made the free agency process a bit more drawn out one than he would’ve preferred. And, of course, he seems very happy in Miami, as evidenced by his increasing role as a team leader with the Marlins.

For his career Prado has hit .293/.342/.423 over 11 seasons. He’ll now be locked up through his age-35 campaign.