And That Happened: Monday's scores and recaps

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Tigers 5, White Sox 4:
After the game, Ozzie Guillen was mad at his poor-performing team and
said this: “If this was the 1980s, [none] of these guys would be in the
big leagues right now, because if you hit .210-.230 and you can’t
execute, I don’t think you should be out here.” I was gonna be all
clever and make fun of Ozzie Guillen the player, but he never hit below
.245 in a full season as a starter. Not that he was good or anything —
in fact, he was quite awful with the bat — but he framed the argument
in terms of batting average, so I’ll let it slide. Other things that
wouldn’t be here if it was the 80s: U.S. Cellular Field; Ozzie
Guillen’s belly, and the grown up version of every player on the roster
short of Jose Contreras, who I think was born during the Ramón Grau
San Martin administration. The first term. Zing!

White Sox 6, Tigers 1:
On second thought, maybe I shouldn’t have made fun of Old Man Contreras
(8 IP, 1 H, 0 ER). Young Gordon Beckham, on the other hand, is now 0-13
to start off his career.

Rockies 5, Cardinals 2:
Jason Marquis wins his eighth, which leads the National League. This
has to be either evidence that wins don’t mean a thing, or evidence
that the talent gulf between the American and National Leagues is
larger than ever, because I sure as hell ain’t gonna admit that Jason
Marquis is any good. My out: maybe the Cardinals are just really bad.
They certainly are lately, as they were swept 4-0 buy Colorado, and
were outscored 33-9 in the process.

Marlins 4, Giants 0:
Sean West dominates the Giants (8 IP, 2 H, 0 ER, 6K). In contrast,
Randy Johnson is now 0-1 for his career on short rest following the
achievement of significant milestone games during which he fell on his
ass while awkwardly fielding a dribbler to the mound. Seriously, you
can look it up.

Yankees 5, Rays 3:
Another hogshead of home runs in Yankee Stadium will no doubt have
people again wondering about the place again. The Yankees will no doubt
claim that the fences are the same distance from home plate as they
were in the old Stadium. And if you don’t believe them, they’ll let you
inspect the survey records, which have been on display down at Yankee
headquarters for the past nine months. They can be found down in the
cellar with the use of a flashlight, since the lights have gone. Be
careful, though, because so have the stairs. Anyway, they’re in the
bottom of a locked filing cabinet in a disused lavatory with a sign on
the door saying “Beware of the Leopard.” See for yourself.

Braves 7, Pirates 6:
Yet another marathon ends with Bobby Cox’s 2000th win with the Braves.
Listen to him boast about it after the game: “All it means is that
you’re getting old and you’ve been around too long.” Stay sassy, Bobby!
Nate McLouth had a nice game against his old mates. Whenever I see
something like this so quickly after a trade I wonder if the player’s
old team just hadn’t gotten around to changing the signs yet. Worth
noting that Andrew McCutchen had a better game. Not that this will stop
all of the Pirates fans from complaining about their team’s annual
selloff.

Blue Jays 6, Rangers 3:
Adam Lind jacks two dingers and has now matched his previous best for
homers in a season with 11, set in 2007. He’s also about 100 points of
OBP and 150 points of slugging ahead of where he was that year too.

Athletics 4, Twins 3:
The A’s extend their winning streak to seven, which is their longest in
three years. Scary moment for Aaron Cunningham, who was hit in the head
in the fourth inning. He stayed in the game for a while, but was
eventually taken to the hospital where he was diagnosed with a
concussion.

Padres 6, Diamondbacks 3:
Adrian Gonzalez is leading the majors in walks, and was given three
more free passes last night. This time Kevin Kouzmanoff — who hits
behind Gonzalez — made someone pay for it, driving in four runs.

Jered Weaver dealing with “dead arm”

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Padres starter Jered Weaver lasted just two-thirds of an inning in Wednesday afternoon’s Cactus League appearance against the Royals. He yielded four runs on three hits, throwing 31 pitches before getting pulled. His spring ERA now sits at an ugly 10.13.

Weaver said he’s been dealing with a “dead arm” since his last bullpen session, but added he’s dealt with the issue in previous springs, Dennis Lin of the San Diego Union-Tribune reports.

The Padres signed Weaver to a one-year, $3 million contract last month. The right-hander is coming off of the worst season of his 11-year career. His fastball averaged a career-low 83 MPH and he put up a 5.06 ERA with a 103/51 K/BB ratio in 178 innings.

Ian Kinsler doesn’t think Puerto Rico or Dominican Republic players play the game the right way

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Update: Whoops…

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Earlier, Craig wrote about Dan Duquette’s dogwhistle language in his criticism of Blue Jays outfielder Jose Bautista. We have some more dogwhistling, this time coming from Tigers (and Team U.S.) second baseman Ian Kinsler. Via Billy Witz of The New York Times:

I hope kids watching the W.B.C. can watch the way we play the game and appreciate the way we play the game as opposed to the way Puerto Rico plays or the Dominican plays. That’s not taking anything away from them. That just wasn’t the way we were raised. They were raised differently and to show emotion and passion when you play. We do show emotion; we do show passion. But we just do it in a different way.

The goal of the World Baseball Classic, created by Major League Baseball, is to promote baseball across the globe. It’s players like Puerto Rico’s Javier Baez who are doing the best job in that regard, not boring white guys from the U.S. Potential baseball fans are not swayed into liking the sport when a player hits a home run and solemnly puts his head down to stroll the bases. They get excited and energized when players show emotion, flip their bats, celebrate. Baez did more to make baseball appeal to new and lapsed audiences with his premature celebration tag than the entire U.S. team has done this tournament.

Furthermore, it is hypocritical to want to diversify the sport’s audience while squelching incoming cultures.

Jim Leyland also got in on the action:

Go Puerto Rico.